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Kids` Birthday Parties: Who Invites Who?

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My twin boys turn 5 in fours weeks and this time they are determined in getting involved in planning the birthday party. Rightly so, I guess. During the first three years, I, Mommy, organized and decided on everything from the location to the guest list. The 4th birthday was somehow squeezed between relocation and settling down in our new residence so there was really no party to speak of.

But this year is THE YEAR when they would have their say.

The venue. No, no party at our own backyard this time. They’ve been invited to several birthday parties themselves so they have their own opinion of what’s cool and what’s not cool. Unfortunately they couldn’t agree between themselves which location is the coolest. So we made a list of the top 3 most popular venues and then we made a draw.

The theme. This was the easy part. It’s going to be a pirates` party. The decision was unanimous.

The menu. Mommy would prepare the menu. No arguments accepted. Maybe next year.

The guests. Old habits die hard. Of course I wanted to invite the play date kids – kids whom I know. But then it’s their party, and of course they wanted to invite their friends from pre-school. So we came up with a compromise. Each boy invites 5 friends, and Mommy proposes another 5 candidates subject to the celebrants` approval. So far so good.

Unfortunately, depending on how things went at pre-school – who quarreled with whom -the guest list constantly changed. Then came the day when the list was finally finalized and the invitations were sent out. That was last week.

Now we’ll just have to wait for the big day. The worst is over. Or so I thought.

Mommy, where’s Gabriel’s invitation?” F asked loudly when he saw his friend yesterday. “But you didn’t want to invite him last week!” I replied in a whisper.

“Look, Mommy, look what Jim drew for me today…Did I invite him to my party?” R asked me today at pick-up time. “That`s nice of him, but no, you didn’t invite him.”

Mommy, can I…?” “No, you can’t. Sorry, we’ve run out of invitations.”

I am now bracing myself for more of this kind of situations in the next few days.

Am I a bit too hard on them?

Maybe I am. But I want them to learn to stand by their own decisions. After all, this is a major milestone in their young life. There will be other parties to come. Some day they might even demand to have separate parties. Or have parties without any Mommy involvement whatsoever. I just hope that when the time comes, they would have learned enough to make the right decisions…

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