Living in a Neighborhood: The Pros and Cons
When we decided to build our house in a new neighborhood, I was naturally excited. I was thrilled to bust out of our two-bedroom townhouse and finally have some space. It was fun to pick out bathroom tile, cabinets and countertops. It was great to finally have a backyard for the kids.
But there’s a lot more to living in a neighborhood than I’d realized. I loved the idea of living someplace with built-in friends for our kids, and for me, too. Neighborhoods are random, though. You never know who might be living next door or across the street.
Like most people in neighborhoods, we’ve had our differences with other people who happen to live on our block. Sometimes our kids get along with the other kids and sometimes they don’t. Sometimes our parenting style clashes with those of other parents, and at times I have been insulted and kept my distance from one particular mom down the street.
As our kids get older, they require less interference, but when we first moved in almost seven years ago, there were days when I asked myself why I’d chosen to live in a neighborhood instead of on a secluded acre somewhere. I am, by nature, a private person but didn’t consider this much before moving into our current home.
The mom down the street frequently reprimanded my children when they were younger. I certainly try to teach my kids right from wrong and everyday courtesy and kindness. But there were certainly times when they misbehaved and I’d expect another parent to intervene at such times. This woman, however, took it on herself to apply her quirky rules to my children. The example that I will always remember is when she told my boys not to wear their baseball caps sideways because this, in her view, made them act rough and talk slang. A cap causing a child to change his behavior was way over the top for me. What right did she have telling my kids what and what not to wear?
I’ll likely be dealing with more of these neighborhood “issues” as our baby gets older and starts to interact with other kids on the block. Our older boys still have disagreements with the neighborhood kids but tend to pick and choose who they spend their time with more carefully.
I don’t think I’m the only one who has found that being plopped in a neighborhood with a random sampling of people certainly has its pros and cons. If we ever move again, I think I’d like a bit more seclusion and privacy. I won’t miss the doorbell ringing at inopportune times. Instead, the kids can invite friends over so we’ll know when to expect them.
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