If you’re like me, you may be starting out with a new family of your own. You have cherished Christmas traditions that you wish to pass on to your children, but you’re also interested in creating new traditions. Or maybe, like me, you live in a warmer climate, and it’s hard to get that “holiday” feeling when the temps are constantly in the 70s and 80s. I have decided that I’m not going to sit around waiting for that holiday feeling I used to get when I lived in snow country, but that I would discover new holiday customs for my growing family.

1. An Ornament for Each Child – A specially chosen ornament for each child every Christmas to put on the tree may not be significant when they’re babies and toddlers. When they’re able to choose the ornament themselves, and then hang it on that 8 ft. tree come December 1st, it will become something each child will eagerly look forward to. Unwrapping each ornament and seeing the growing collection of keepsakes can trigger special memories of each Christmas spent long after they’ve forgotten the present they got last year. When they’re older, they can keep the ornaments in their own homes, perhaps leaving several special ones to spruce up the parent’s tree.

2. Go Ice Skating - (and drink hot chocolate at the rink side) There’s nothing quite like gliding on smooth ice in an outdoor skating rink or if you’ve got a natural pond that’s frozen over, good for you! I have to settle with a man-made one but I’ll take it. You can’t ice skate all year. And lacing up those first pair of ice skates for your little ones can be the start of a long-standing holiday tradition. Don’t forget to have some warm beverage like hot chocolate, or hot apple cider to help with that little nip in the air, even if the nip is manufactured by ice machines.

3. Watch the Nutcracker – It’s kind of a rite of passage for many little ones to be taken to their first stage show. It makes it even more significant to watch this classic and perennial favorite that usually only appears during the month of December. Other ideas would be watching plays or musicals put on by your local Children’s theaters. We’re taking our 2 year old to A Christmas Carol put on by the Children’s Theater group this Friday. Make sure to check the recommended age, and gauge your child’s own tastes before taking them to a particular show. I was pleasantly surprised to see that A Christmas Carol was recommended for all ages.

4. Make Christmas Arts & Crafts – I’m planning to make paper snowflakes with my daughter when she’s older. I’ve found simple directions online and (I hope) that she’ll enjoy all the paper paraphernalia and eventual snowflakes that will come out of them. It’s bonding time well-spent in my opinion. (I must confess, I am pretty excited and will probably try it this year, though my 2 year old will not be able to participate in cutting). For the little ones. you can stick to non-scissors activity like making pipe cleaner candy canes or glittery pinecones which you can then have them hang around the house for decoration, or to trim the tree.

5. Bake Christmas Cookies – (or make other confections). I don’t bake much except for around the holidays. This year, I’ve bought my sugar cookie mix, got my cookie sheet and special Christmas cookie cutters shaped like a Christmas tree and snowman, plus colorful sprinkles. Yes, even a two-year old will enjoy making the cookies with you, especially the tasting part . You can guide their little wrist with the cutting, and have them help with the decorations. Having them wait in anticipation for the completion of their handiwork makes this even more fun.

6. Watch Christmas Parades - How often do you get to see Santa and his reindeer, elves, and other festive fixtures in holiday parades? Bundle up the kids and watch their eyes light up! Be sure to see the BIG parade on Christmas morning!

7. Go on a Christmas Light Tour - Every city has them, pockets of neighborhoods where every house in the cul-de-sac, street, etc. has a tradition of putting up Christmas decor on steroids, attracting passers-by on foot or car to admire the handiwork. Last year, my toddler was too little to really care, but we’re going again this year because, personally, I really, really enjoyed it.

8. Listen to Christmas Carolers (or sing yourselves!) – Waiting for Christmas carolers to stumble on your doorstep is probably futile. Most Christmas carols are organized events. Check with your church, your local schools if they have any caroling planned. They will usually tell you the neighborhood at which they’ll sing, and what dates and times so you can be around to watch and revel in the holiday songs.

And of course, there is always the lovely unveiling of Santa and his elves, as well as Christmas movies, Christmas feasts, and whatever else your family loves doing come holiday season. I hope the suggestions above are helpful, and I hope that your family enjoys them!

There are many ways to make each holiday season special. We’d love to hear about your family’s special holiday traditions.

Of course, there are a million ways to celebrate the holiday of love. But kids don’t need a million things, and I haven’t got a million bucks. So here are my Top 10 Ways to Celebrate Valentine’s Day with kids:

1. Say “I love you” all the time.
2. Even if it can’t all happen on the same day–February 14–make time for each of your children alone. Even if it just 30 minutes in their bedroom, nothing says “I love you” like one-on-one time doing something they enjoy.
3. Learn about the real St. Valentine and why we celebrate him. This is a great way to reinforce your values. For some, it also emphasizes religious beliefs.
4. Buy a large heart-shaped cookie cutter and use it all day. In the morning, coat it with non-stick cooking spray and pour pancake batter into it to make heart pancakes. At lunch, use it to cut out the middle of sandwiches. For dinner, cut heart-shaped biscuits.
5. Cook together. It could be as elaborate as breakfast in bed for Daddy, or as simple as baking a brownie mix. Whatever the recipe, kids love to be in the kitchen with a parent.
6. Don’t give roses, plant a rose bush. In many parts of the country, February is a good month to plant bare-root roses. Enjoy them for many Valentine’s Days to come!
7. Encourage your children to be loving to others, no strings attached. Volunteer at a soup kitchen or engage in a similar community outreach program.
8. Remind children that loving relationships are two-way. Help them spend time to make and send personal greeting cards for loved ones. But be sure to start early! Trying to make a bunch of beautiful Valentines at the last minute is sure to take the love out of them.
9. Start a new tradition. That could mean something different for every family. One year, I was short on money and time. I took my 3-year old son to Party City and bought him a red foil heart balloon for 99 cents. He insisted we get one again every year. A tradition was born! Little kids love rituals. And though older kids may insist they are “stupid” or at best unnecessary, these traditions are the things we remember as adults.
10. Say, “I love you” again!

The Winter Solstice is December 21, bringing with it a different significance to many people. An American school child may remember that it is the shortest day of the year, the first day of winter. To the ancients it was the most powerful day of the year, of great astrological significance. Pagans did (and still do) view it as a day for celebrating renewal. The early Christian church saw it as an enemy to be conquered.

To be sure, they did conquer it. In fact, the church was so successful at overtaking the pagan customs, and wrapping them in new clothes, that you may celebrate the Winter Solstice and not even know it! The following Christmas traditions are, in fact, lifted wholesale from various Winter Solstice celebrations.

Gift giving:
Although Christians give gifts to represent the gift that God gave his people (Jesus), the Romans gave winter gifts long before Christmas was started. The Roman holiday of Sigillaria was celebrated by giving children rings and seals.

Yule Logs:
Burning a yule log was seen by the Scandinavians as a way to fight off the cold and dark, as well as to bring good luck. Oak represents the waxing (or, coming) solar year, and holly represents the waning (or, closing) solar year.

Mistletoe:
The Scandinavians are also responsible for bringing us the tradition of kissing under the mistletoe. In Norse mythology, the god of evil (Loki), gave the god of winter (Hoder) an arrow made from mistletoe. He used the arrow to kill the god of the summer sun (Balder). His mother was so happy that she kissed everyone who passed under the tree. Her tears of joy became the berries on the plant.

Candle Lighting:
Candles are used symbolically for Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa celebrations. It is a custom started by the Romans, who lit candles to convince the sun to shine again and to ward off evil.

Bell Ringing:
Christmas celebrations often include bells—ranging from bold church bells in steeples to tiny silver bells on shoes. This idea came from Pagan celebrations, which were noisy affairs, including bells and other noisemakers intended to frighten away evil spirits.

Christmas trees and other greenery:
Germanic cultures celebrated the solstice by lighting an evergreen, the “tree of life”. The Romans decorated their homes with green plants, as did European pagans, believing their magic powers enabled them to live when other things died. Many Christians use evergreens as a symbol of eternal life.

In Europe, many pagan cultures constructed megaliths as part of Winter Solstice worship. Although Stonehenge is NOT likely a place of worship for the solstice, it is the best-known example of this type of engineering. One place in Ireland, known as Newgrange, was built for this purpose. It is so perfectly aligned that even thousands of years later, the rising winter solstice sun shines through a “key hole” and down a passageway to illuminate an engraving (the triple spiral) on an upturned stone. Nothing in contemporary religious celebrations mimics this feat. And since they could not integrate this aspect of winter celebration into their culture, the medieval church simply ignored these ruins and let them fall into obscurity.

Of course, many non-religious people continue to enjoy Winter Solstice festivities today. Do you celebrate the solstice? Whether it is instead of or in addition to a modern religious holiday—tell us how!

I took the baby to see my sister’s production of The Nutcracker over the weekend. It is always amazing to see how my sister pulls this show together each year.This year she has three kids of her own to care for, ages 9, 5 and 6 months.

Unfortunately, I screwed up our family calendar, so my husband and older boys were busy at various sports events. We usually all go as a family and plan to do so again next year.

What struck me was the fact that the baby watched, mesmerized, for the entire performance. Okay…after the intermission, he squirmed a bit in his grandmother’s arms, so my mom carried him over to me. He watched the rest of the show from my arms.

This little guy seems to love music and the other day he even enjoyed watching a ballet performance. I’m sure it was the whole thing that held his attention: the colorful props, costumes, lively music as well as the dancing. Maybe 7 months is a little young to instill a love for the arts in a child but it just so happens that my sister is an accomplished dancer and now, teacher. We have always tried to maintain a balance with our kids. We are O.D.’d on sporting events but as my husband and I always enjoyed art, music and live theatre on occasion, we want to instill some appreciation of all of this in our children.

Once or twice a year, we take our boys to the Philadelphia Art Museum. Special exhibits include headsets which  give  you a narrated tour, sharing insights into the paintings (or other art forms) as well as into the artist’s life and history. There are two options to choose from: the adult version and the children’s version. Our kids enjoy it. We’ll do the same with our new little guy.

The kids especially like taking a trip to Chinatown for lunch, afterwards! I want to be sure that my kids are cultured and allowed to explore the exciting world outside the tiny bubble of our neighborhood, school and everyday lives. They learn a lot in school but it is also our job, as parents, to expose them to new things, educate them and be sure that they are well-rounded.

As we carry down from the attic and unpack the decorations and ornaments from Christmases past, my husband and I reflected on some holiday family traditions we had each celebrated as children and that we wish to continue with our family together. With our first baby’s arrival at the beginning of last year, she’s now old enough to start to understand what the holidays are about. And now, with a new baby just days from entering the world, we’re ready to go all out to make the season extra special.

We both had memories of baking cookies in the kitchen with our mothers and grandmothers, putting up and decorating the Christmas tree and sharing steaming mugs of spiced cider, but neither of us has any lasting keepsakes of these holidays, except for some old photographs and a few holiday cards.

Because of this, we decided to set our own holiday traditions for our children that will give them lasting keepsakes that they can hold onto and take with them. When my husband and I first began dating, we would select a tree ornament each holiday that would commemorate the past year. Sometimes it’s silly (a Christmas pickle ornament – a German tradition), sometimes it’s serious (a key to symbol the purchase of our first house), but it is always something that’s meaningful to us as a couple.

We’ve now extended this tradition to our children. Upon our daughter’s birth, we began to buy two ornaments for the tree – one to celebrate her, and one for us. On the year of her first Christmas, we purchased a cross to symbolize the blessing we had received, as well as a small silver frame in which we put our first family portrait. This year, we will have two babies at Christmastime, so we will choose three new ornaments – one for us as a family and one for each of our children. They will all hang on our Christmas tree each year, and, when our daughter and son all both all grown up and on their own, we’ll pack them up and pass them on to the two of them. That way, they will each have with them a collection of meaningful ornaments that they can hang on their own trees. We think it’s a great way to start a new tradition and to give our children something to symbolize all the love and joy that they have shared with us.

Do you have any new traditions you’ve started since becoming parents?

My maternal grandfather was raised Jewish.  There is a funny story about how my grandfather took my grandmother out to dinner on one of their first dates and he warned her to not let his aunt know that they had eaten any foods that weren’t kosher.  When my grandmother met his aunt she proudly announced that they had eaten a delectable appetizer of shrimp – which, by the way, isn’t kosher – and my poor grandfather just hung his head and waited for his aunt to read him the riot act.

Although he doesn’t consider himself Jewish anymore as far as religion goes, my grandfather is culturally Jewish.  Both my uncles had Bar Mitzvahs and matzo ball soup is common fare at my grandparents’ house, but as far as their religion goes they are Christian.  It’s an interesting combination when the Christmas decorations come out and there’s a menorah right alongside the nativity scene.

I know the very moment that I decided that I wanted to share some of this culture with my own children.  My son was a newborn and my grandparents were visiting.  My son was cooing and gurgling like newborns do, and my grandfather leaned down and started singing a Yiddish song about a rabbi and a hat to him that I had never heard before.  My son quieted while my grandfather sang, and it was such a lovely moment that I distinctly remember tears coming to my eyes.

There is only so much I can teach my kids about the Jewish culture because I was never exposed to it too much.  We’re a Christian family so we celebrate Christmas, but I would love for my kids to know about how people in our family’s past celebrated Hanukkah.  The problem is that at my kids’ tender ages I don’t think they realize that anybody believes anything differently than what they learn in Sunday school.  Does bringing other religious beliefs into the mix at such tender ages confuse them, or broaden their horizons?

I’m not saying we’re going to convert to Judaism.  I’m saying that I want my children to have a connection to our ancestors that might otherwise be forgotten if I don’t make an effort to keep it alive.  Then again, maybe I’m just full of mishegoss to think that I can mingle the family traditions of the two faiths during the holiday season.

Any suggestions?

I truly believe that the Holidays are for kids.  I remember as a young child, we had lots of good family traditions that sends me to Nostalgia Lane every time I remember them.  From going to bed and being woken at midnight to let me know that Santa was there at the house leaving the presents!  Did I want to catch him?  Me and my brother and aunt (1.5 year older than me) would run to catch him but of course, we were always a few seconds too late.

Then there was the new outfits for Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve.  The New Year’s Eve outfit would have polka dots to bring lots of prosperity for the new year, and I’d always match with my aunt.

The menu rarely changed from year to year, and the same comforting faces showed up for the festivities. Christmas is a terrific time to spend time with family.

As we grew older and moved away, these traditions were sort of lost as well.  I still have a good time during the holidays, but that sense of expectation, of tradition is missing.  And it’s something I want to start with my daughter. It’s important to me because much like I had such great memories of childhood holidays, so too do I wish for my daughter to have the same.

• Buy her a new ornament for each year.
• Get a monogrammed Santa stocking hung up for her.
• Get Christmas decorations up as soon as the calendar hits the first day of December.
• Make Santa come alive for her.
• Teach her the Christmas songs I learned and loved as a child.
• Watch Christmas parades…I have never been to on! This is one I can start as a tradition with my child.
• Generally make the holidays the best time filled with warmth, comfort, and love.

Happy  Holidays!

Most American children know the Christmas story, or at least the legends surrounding the celebration-i.e., Jesus and/or Santa Claus and his reindeer. But while you go about your Christmas preparations, you may want to also inform your kids about other holidays celebrated this season-or at least be prepared to answer their questions. For me, I had to take a crash course when my then-five year old son and I were in the post office one holiday season. He saw some Kwanzaa stamps and wanted to know what that was. I didn’t really know, so I had to look it up. And while I was at it, I also decided to learn about Hanukkah.

If you are a non-religious family, studying the cultural and religious practices of others is still a great way to learn about the world around you. For Christians, it can serve as a platform from which to reinforce your own faith, values, symbols and celebrations.

Kwanzaa, a cultural holiday celebrated by some African Americans from December 26 to January 1, was initiated in 1966 and may be observed in addition to faith-based holidays.

The name ‘Kwanzaa’ comes from a Swahili phrase meaning “first fruits”. Based on African harvest celebrations, the holiday serves to introduce and reinforce seven principles of African culture. In English, they are:

• Unity
• Self-determination
• Collective work and responsibility
• Cooperative economics
• Purpose
• Creativity
• Faith

Each day of the week long festival includes a family gathering, a re-dedication to one of the seven principles, and the lighting of one more of seven candles. Celebrants enjoy a feast on December 31 and a Day of Meditation on January 1, intended as a time to recommit to all the values that Kwanzaa celebrates.
All of the objects and decorations used in Kwanzaa festivities are highly symbolic, especially the colors: black (representing the people), red (representing the blood of their struggle) and green (representing the hope of the future). Gifts given to children are often handmade, and are supposed to be books or cultural symbols, an intentional rejection of other commercialized holidays.

Chanukah, or Hanukkah, also known as the Festival of Lights, is an eight-day holiday observed by Jewish people, beginning on the 25th of Kislev (December 21st-29th, 2008). Some Messianic Jews also celebrate the birth of Jesus, but rarely does a religious Jewish family recognize Christmas.

Hanukkah, meaning “dedication”, commemorates a successful coup in 165 BC against Antiochus Epiphanes, who had defiled the Temple and prohibited the Jews from observing their religion. A small band of rebels finally recaptured Jerusalem, and the Temple was rededicated-on the 25th day of Kislev.

Upon reentering the temple, they found only enough purified oil to burn the eternal light for one day (ritual purification of the oil takes seven days), but “a great miracle happened there”-the oil burned for eight days, thus, the traditional explanation of the eight days of Hanukkah.

Jewish families give gifts and money, pray blessings, eat foods fried in oil, play the dreidel game, and light one more candle on the menorah, a candelabra with 9 candles (eight to remember the miracle, and the ninth—the servant candle-to light the others).

When you tell your children about Kwanzaa and Hanukkah, it’s also a good time to make sure your children know why your family celebrates the way it does. Maybe you can tell them this year about the real St. Nicholas, or where the twelve days of Christmas came from. Why do we have Christmas trees? What’s the reason we give gifts? Why do some people celebrate Christmas on January 7? It’s easy to skip over the symbols and traditions of Christmas, and unfortunately, our children often learn more details about customs foreign to them.

Above all, don’t forget to enjoy the holiday however you like best. It should not be a burden, but a delight. And a terrific way to spend time with family and loved ones.