With families so busy these days it’s sometimes hard to make time for your health by exercising. How can you justify an hour at the gym away from your family when you haven’t seen them all day and dinner’s still up in the air? With parents working harder than ever, homework piling up for kids, extracurricular activities plus the hours it takes to commute to and from those activities, it’s easy to let things slip through the cracks: Take-outs most days of the week, eating in front of the TV soon becomes the norm.

But in today’s stressful, high-tech world, it’s even more crucial to stay healthy and personally connect with your kids, and with your spouse. Your body is your only body, and if your health is neglected and falls by the wayside, everything can go by the wayside too. Your family is your only family, and the same rule applies.

How to keep your family healthy?

• Eat often and eat healthy. Pick healthy foods, and don’t skip meals. You and your kids have a lot on your day’s schedule and you need the fuel to get through it. Chips and soda isn’t going to help you stay alert and healthy. Experts say to eat every 2 hrs. That means a breakfast, lunch, dinner and two snacks in between meals.Time constrained? Pre-prepare meals before-hand if needed, and pre-package snacks in snack baggies that can be grabbed to go from the pantry . Make your own trailmix filled with nutritious foods like nuts, whole-wheat pretzels, raisins. Resist the temptation for frozen or pre-packackaged foods or snacks as they do not pack the same nutritional punch as home-made munchies, and often contain unhealthy ingredients like partially hydrogenated oils and high-fructose corn syrup.

• Exercise at least 20 minutes a day. An hour is just unmanageable for a lot of families, but just 20 minutes of exercise a day is better than nothing . What’s more, if the activity is something that you enjoy, you end up doing it for longer than 20 minutes.What can you do as a family? Chase the kids in the backyard for at least 20 minutes. Walk the dog together. Take a bike ride around the neighborhood. I know a lot of parents who’ve purchased the bike trailer to attach to their bikes.

• Eat dinner together at least five nights a week. First thing you should do is make sure the the TV is off. It IS possible to eat dinner together. Studies show that families who eat dinner together on most nights have healthier kids who choose more fruits and vegetables even when not at home. It also provides time and opportunity to catch up on everyone’s lives, and it becomes the perfect time to open up lines of communication.What if dinner together is just impossible to make happen? Turn breakfast into your family meal. Make sure you wake up early enough that it isn’t a harried affair.

• Have fun as a family. Take the time to do something silly and fun with the kids. Game night, playing music, dancing, throw water balloons in the backyard, even watching a favorite show together as a family can be a destressing event for each member of the family. All the activities listed are at-home activities because you’re not taking up more valuable time driving somewhere, and they usually end up being cheaper!

• Get plenty of sleep. Sleep should be a calming time, and you need it for your body to recover from the day. Lack of sleep carries the same symptoms as being under the influence. Your groggy, your reflexes aren’t as fast, and you can fall asleep at the wheel while driving. Your kids won’t be able to concentrate as well in school if they’re too sleepy to pay attention. Get your family into a routine that includes lights out at a time that gives you all plenty of time to sleep.

• Don’t forget date night. A strong, happy couple is the backbone of any happy family so you shouldn’t forget about each other. Sure you can hire a baby-sitter to get away from the kids once in a while, but any moment you take time to connect as a couple is better than nothing. This can mean having a later bed-time than the kids and popping open a bottle of wine, plopping in front of the TV and watching an R-rated movie together. Better yet, forget the TV and have a conversation. One caveat: kid topics not allowed. Talk about your day, reminisce, make plans for the future, anything as long as it’s not diapers, and toilet training. You’ll feel a lot closer doing so.

Six tips. How do you incorporate them into your day? Start one at a time. Announce it to the family and get everyone excited and on board. They all involve almost no work or minimal alterations at worst, and the payoff can be huge. Start this week and see if you can’t incorporate all six into your family routine by the end of the month. Please report back and tell us how your family feels after adopting these habits!

Source: Families.com

I’ll never forget the moment when I was absolutely sure that I just couldn’t keep going as a mom.  My two year old was having a fitful sleep and kept waking me up with her yelps from the nightmares she was having.  My newborn was sleeping in the bed with me because it was the only way we could get him to sleep.  My husband was asleep downstairs because he couldn’t handle getting woken up several times an hour, so I was left to deal with it all on my own.

My son woke up crying, so I woke up and discovered that his diaper had leaked all over us, so both him and I were covered with pee.  The bed was soaked but I didn’t have the gumption to get up and get new sheets because I was exhausted.  It then hit me that I was completely willing to sleep in a puddle of pee because I didn’t have the energy to go get new sheets, so I started crying right along with my son.  I held him and cried, and figured that if there was a breaking point for moms then it probably looked a little something like this: a sobbing mom sitting in a puddle of pee with a crying newborn.

Ah, memories.

If you’re a new parent then you can expect to have moments like this.  You might not wind up in the exact same situation – I really hope you don’t, by the way – but it could be any number of things.  I had one friend who absolutely lost it on her father-in-law when he ate the last banana in the house that was supposed to be for her baby’s breakfast.  I had another friend who called me sobbing in a panic because she just couldn’t stand looking at the walls in her house anymore, yet couldn’t fathom gathering her twin boys into the car to leave.  A few years later, all of us are competent moms who only break down sobbing once in a great while, and usually because our kids do something so moving that we cry from good emotions.

The point is that you can get through the really tough times with your baby.  Yes, there will be times when you are so exhausted and so emotional that you feel like you simply can’t do anything other than stay in bed and cry, but try to keep it all in perspective.  You’re tired, you’re hormonal, and chances are you’re a little overwhelmed by the thought of being responsible for another life.  It’s no wonder we all crack once in a while.

You can do it.  Trust me.

Sleep as much as you can now because, once the baby comes, you won’t sleep. This is advice that many parents-to-be hear – and promptly ignore. But my husband and I quickly learned just how true it is. Whether your baby is easy going or colicky, hungry all the time or a good eater, you probably won’t get much sleep – at least the first few weeks.

Both of our babies were “good” babies – they ate well, didn’t fuss much – but that doesn’t mean they didn’t keep us awake. As many new parents know, a breastfeeding baby eats very frequently. It seemed like by the time my son finished eating, he was hungry again and the cycle started all over again. There were days when I could literally start and finish reading an entire book in a day while I was nursing the baby.

Formula fed babies generally stay full a little longer, giving new parents just enough time between feedings and diaper changes to actually eat a sandwich or take a shower – but probably not both. On the bright side, anyone can give the baby a bottle – not just sleep-deprived Mom.

And then there are the diaper changes. You can be certain that any baby who is eating around the clock is also wetting many diapers. Diaper changes might not take long, but they’re enough of a disturbance to baby that he or she will probably be wide awake by the time the diaper has been changed … and hungry again!

So what’s a new, sleep-deprived parent to do? Follow another popular piece of advice: sleep when the baby sleeps. While a few minutes of sleep here and there aren’t nearly as restful as a longer stretch, it’s still very much needed sleep. Sleep when you can, whether it’s the middle of the night or the middle of the day. Don’t worry about the housework or the laundry – it’ll still be there when you wake up.

And remember, the newborn stage goes quickly. Just when you begin to accept that you may never sleep through the night again, your baby will suddenly sleep for a longer period – letting everyone finally get some rest.

I have very little experience in putting one baby to sleep. I can’t tell you how to put three or more babies to sleep at the same time. But as a mom of twins, I sure do know how to put twin babies to sleep. At least my babies. Because every baby is different.

Here are some of my strategies.

Schedule. A regular sleeping schedule for one baby is important. Much more with two. It is important that they would be more or less on the same schedule. It’s better for the babies but also for Mommy. We always had our bedtime routine of washing, storytelling (yes, I read to them even as babies mainly our favourites Guess how much I love and Mr. Brown can moo) and lullaby singing. I also tried to have naptimes on schedule. As fellow blogger brit has written, a schedule disruption can lead to an overtired and rather crabby baby. Times two, in my case.

Separate beds. My boys were in the same room but had separate beds right from the start. I found that they were less likely to disturb each other when they woke at night. Also I had an extra bed in another room just in case. Often, when one baby woke up in the middle of the night, I would take him downstairs and put him in his playpen. He’d play and eventually fall asleep there and I’d simply cover him with a blanket and keep him there till morning. When both babies woke up at night – well, that’s another story.

Anything that swings  or rocks - Hammocks and rocking/swinging beds. I would have loved to rock my babies to sleep. But aside from the fact that the ratio of 2 babies to 1 mom makes this logistically almost impossible, there’s also the safety part to consider. Holding two babies in one go increases the chances of dropping one -or even both. Especially when you are sleep-deprived. Now, I know moms of twins who swear to baby hammocks or rocking beds. We didn’t have any of those and we didn’t want to buy them either so we improvised. I used my babies’ car seats as sleeping baskets – at least for naps. I swung them, one in each hand till my arm muscles ached. I made sure they were securely buckled up, though. Or I took one baby in my arms, while I rocked the other one in his car seat with my foot.

Pram/buggy. In the mornings, the best way to get them to nap was push them on the pram. I did this every morning, rain or shine, warm or cold. After they had fallen asleep, I would head back home and place the pram on our roofed terrace. Yes, my boys napped outdoors. And I got to exercise!

Car. Now, if everything else fails, I’d load the babies and the car seats in the car and go for a drive. Ten minutes max and they would be napping. We also tried to schedule our long drives during nap time to avoid disruption in their sleeping patterns.

Physical activity. As soon as they could walk, I kept them physically active, e.g. a walk around the block (without the buggy!) or a couple of hours at the playground. I found that they sleep/nap after exercise.

I guess I did something right along the way because my boys started sleeping through at 5 months and continued to nap till they were 4 years old, one even till he was almost 5! Or maybe they are just sleepy heads by nature. Whatever I did that worked, I found out by trial and error.  These are definitely not found in the books. As I said before, each baby is different and Mommy has to simply find out what works for her baby!

My almost three-year-old son is giving up his nap. Sigh. On the days where he naps, he’s wide awake at bedtime, past bedtime, way past bedtime, and is still trying to jump on the bed and sing songs about weasels at 9.30pm. A few cranky afternoons excepted, he’s a happy little chap all day when he doesn’t nap. I am currently in mourning for my afternoon sleep/internet surfing session/occasional housework binge.

After having a newborn who sleeps randomly, it’s nice when baby settles into more or less of a routine of three or four naps a day. By six months, babies usually need two naps a day at fairly regular times and moms start to relax (just a little) that they have gotten the hang of this nap business.

Bar teething and colds and other things that disrupt napping, the two-nap period is usually a fairly predictable one that moms can plan other activities around, like playdates, appointments and going to the store.

Then, just once you think you have a handle on napping, it all changes. Around when babies turn one, they decide that they only need one nap a day. I have a friend who’s son quit napping altogether at 9 months and another friend with a 16-month-old who still naps twice a day, so that date is subject to change.

The transition from two naps to one can be rough. There’s mornings when baby denies that she is tired. Then is too tired to fall asleep, has a 20 minute nap and is grumpy/hyper until she crashes in the afternoon. Or baby will nap beautifully in the morning, then be wide eyed all the rest of the day, go to bed early, then wake up extremely early, and her naps the next day are thrown off. Or any other permutations of refusing to nap, napping at odd times, random nap lengths and all that kind of fun.

The two-naps-to-one transition can take a couple of weeks to get through, and oftentimes nighttime sleep is disturbed too, as baby is probably not getting the rest she needs during the day, or might be getting more than she needs and isn’t as tired at night.

The good news? Once babies settle into the one nap routine, they tend to nap for longer. A two hour afternoon nap seems to be a common pattern, and is bliss after the 40-minute naps of before. It’s the perfect length for mom to have a nap too, watch a couple of TiVo’d episodes of Lost, or surf the internet. You thought you were the only one? Internet page views have a spike mid-afternoon and I’m guessing that’s a whole load of moms emailing, hitting facebook, writing their blogs and even visiting this site (thank you) while baby naps. So I think you’ll agree that the aggravation in making the transition is well worth it.

Being a parent is an exhausting job, there’s no doubt about it. However, you don’t have to feel exhausted all the time. Here are some things I’ve discovered that really sap my energy and make it more difficult to keep up with my energetic family.

Not Eating
I’ve found that I really need to watch what I eat if I expect to have enough energy to run after my 5 kids. I admit that mornings are a crazy time in our house. Sometime around mid-morning I feel my energy level crash and realize that I forgot to eat!

Over-Doing the Caffeine
It’s tempting to grab a cup of coffee when I need a quick energy burst. However, over-doing the caffeine consumption can actually make you more tired when the fix wears off. Plus, too much caffeine can make you irritable, irritate your stomach, or cause heart palpitations. It’s best to watch your caffeine consumption if you hope to keep your energy levels up.

Not Sleeping
Have you ever been so tired or stressed that you can’t sleep? Or worse yet, remember how you have finally gotten your baby to sleep through the night but you are still waking up for that 2am feeding and having trouble getting back to sleep?

It can be difficult to find the energy you need during the day when you aren’t getting a good sleep during the night. I’ve heard that sleep experts recommend that adults develop a sleep routine in order to promote better sleep habits. I guess if sleep routines work for children, they should work for adults. It sounds reasonable anyway.

I’m trying to work on this subject in my own life because the holiday season is fast approaching. While I love all of the wonderful things that go along with celebrating this special time of year, I realize that it takes energy to be able to do all the things I will need to do. That means that I need to work on creating good habits now (like exercising, eating right, reducing my caffeine and getting sleep) that will enable me to find the energy I need to take me through the holidays and beyond!

A lesson I’ve learned the hard way, is that sometimes, once Baby sleeps through the night, he is not necessarily programmed to do so forever. His patterns may go through more changes as he continues to change and grow, especially during his first two years.

I have vague memories of our older boys, sleep habits, especially those first couple of exhausting months, but now that we’re starting over again with our latest edition, I am reminded (all too painfully) that sleep disturbances can reoccur as a baby develops.

I like Elizabeth Pantley’s ‘No-cry sleep solution‘, from which I’ve only read excerpts. Once our baby slept all night long, I happily tucked Pantley’s book away on the book shelf, next to our other parenting books. Now I find myself staring at this book through bleary eyes, again.

I spoke with the pediatrician last week, out of desperation and frustration. I wanted to be sure I wasn’t missing some hidden cause for baby’s night-time waking. Her concerns were pretty much the same as mine. This is a basic checklist when trouble-shooting about baby’s sleep troubles:

• Is he hungry/has he had enough to eat during the previous day/evening?
• Is he experiencing pain or discomfort due to teething?
• Is he experiencing pain due to reflux, a common ailment in young babies, which is similar to heartburn in adults?
• Is he breathing easily or are his nose stuffy, causing interruptions in his sleep?

At bedtime, does he fall asleep while nursing, bottle-feeding or sucking his pacifier (and therefore, need one of these in order to fall back asleep when he awakens at night)?

• Is his sleep environment comfortable: not too hot, not too cold, not too dry?

Most of these problems can be easily tended to. If Baby is hungry, you may need to work harder at filling his belly during the day. Our pediatrician suggested feeding our little guy cereal at four months old, then slowly introducing other solids and working up to three meals a day fairly quickly. Sometimes our Baby is interested and sometimes he ‘poo-poos’ his meals by turning his head away and fussing. Figure out which foods are your baby’s favorites; our little man prefers oatmeal, sweet potatoes and apple sauce at this stage.

Reflux should be diagnosed by a doctor, and yes, our baby has suffered from it. He used to arch his back and cry when he was eating. The doctor prescribed Prilosec, twice a day. My hunch is that he has outgrown this but we are continuing to give him at least his evening dose, until he evens out and sleeps again.

If Baby sounds stuffy, use saline drops and a bulb syringe several times a day to help clear his little nose. A cool mist humidifier is a good idea.

(Signs and remedies for teething can be found in an earlier post I wrote, as well as in a recent post by a fellow blogger.)

Our baby’s problem right now is the toughest one to solve: We made the mistake of giving him a bottle in the middle of the night a few weeks ago. Now he’s back in the habit of ‘nibbling’ in order to fall back asleep. He seems to be getting up every three hours for a nibble (he used to sleep 7-10 hours, through the night).

We will weigh our options and try to re-train him to sleep. I prefer gentler methods, such as Pantley’s, but out of desperation, am tempted to let him ‘cry it out’ just a little bit. Mommies and daddies need to function for the rest of the family. We have to go to work to earn a living, run errands, cook, clean, help with homework, sit through (and sometimes coach, as in the case of my husband) soccer and baseball games. We need our sleep in order to accomplish all of this. Our baby is old enough to start ‘crying it out’. I’m just not sure if I’m tough enough to let him.

It happened again. On the way to town, where we had an exciting evening of errand running, prescription picking up and coffee consuming, our daughter nodded off in her car seat. Since she had indulged in her daily after lunch nap already, we figured she would be good to go until we got home, barring any unforeseen diaper changes and feedings.

But about halfway to our first stop, my husband and I noticed that it seemed awfully quiet in the backseat. No longer did we hear the gibberish and squeals that our daughter usually makes when she is back there playing with her toys; no, suddenly we could hear the radio clearly ? and nothing else. I turned my head and looked. Sure enough, her eyes had that glazed over look that only comes before the sleepiness sets in. It wouldn?t be long before her eyelids would begin to get heavy and her head would fall to one side of the headrest. Within a minute, she?d be out.

I turned to my husband. What should we do? If she sleeps now, we?ll never get her to bed.

But if she is tired but doesn?t sleep now, we?ll never get anything done. Had we been home, we simply would have woken her up and tried to get her going again with some music or a favorite toy ? anything to get her back into active play mode so that she would stay awake for the next few hours. But in the car, our hands were tied ? and she was quickly falling into a deeper sleep.

Let?s just let her sleep until our first stop, we decided. So we did, and my husband reached in and gingerly lifted her from her car seat, not waking her up. He carried her into the first store, and noise of being in public gradually woke her up. She smiled up at us, wiggled her way down, and surprised us with a good mood for the rest of the trip. She even went to bed that night on schedule, as usual.

If only we could all be so refreshed after a ten minute nap!

The baby is sleeping. That’s good. A couple of days ago, she decided that napping was for the birds. She logged about half an hour in total naptime between 9 am and 9 pm. It was a long day. We thought she might sleep extra long that night since she was so exhausted, but no luck. She did pretty well yesterday, but that brings me to my question. I need some wise advice.

Several weeks ago I reported happily that swaddling was working. When she was about 2 months old, she would consistently sleep from roughly 9:30 pm to 5:00 am. That lasted almost a month.

Then she started waking up at 2:30 am. I was determined NOT to feed her (because she obviously hadn’t needed it before and I didn’t want her to start waking up for a little snuggle and snack). For two nights, I got out of bed, put a pacifier in her mouth, and she’d sleep for another 20-30 minutes until she popped the binky out and woke up again. I wanted her to hold out to eat until 5:00, so this was an exhausting ritual. A combination of advice and logic told me we needed to lose that pacifier. So I quit letting her take it to bed. And things were good for a week or so (minus a few random days). She had her four month check up and I reported that things were good at night, so I missed my opportunity to get the doctor?s input. Because within a couple of days, she quit sleeping again.

For the last few weeks, the child just won’t sleep. She cuts her naps short, she stirs about an hour after being put to bed at night, and the she wakes up around 3:00-4:00, and won’t settle back down, really. During the day, she still goes at least four hours between nursings, so it’s not like she?s in a growth spurt and just wants to eat.

My husband has moved into my son?s trundle bed, since he has to go to work at 6:45. I have no brain power to do much, especially writing. So instead of offering up information to you today, I can only offer this question:

What in the world is wrong? She’s goes to sleep on her own, for the most part. She doesn’t take a pacifier to go to sleep. She used to be able to sleep all night.

My son didn’t sleep through the night until he was 9 months old. So I just accepted that. I was much younger, though. But I can’t believe I’m the only one out there with a baby that quit sleeping. What did you do? Help me (and the other struggling moms)!

In exchange, when I get my mind cleared in a few days, I’ll tell you about the best advice I received for daily life with baby #2.

I’m writing this at 11:15 at night, big cup of coffee at my side, fully aware that in less than six or seven hours I’ll be crawling out of bed and starting another full day of writing, cleaning, and chasing my two kiddos around. I know I should be asleep, but hey…a mom’s gotta do what a mom’s gotta do.

This isn’t uncommon for me unfortunately, so I was quite interested when I came across an article posted by the Nursing Online Education Database: 50 Ways to Boost Your Energy Without Caffeine. My first reaction to the the title was this: “Yeah, right.” Upon reading it, though, it became apparent that they had some good points. I am trying to give up caffeine, so maybe I should try some of their suggestions. Here were some of my favorites:

1. Get more sleep. Well, yeah.
2. Exercise.
3. Get massages.
4. Get sunlight during the day.
5. Avoid people who drain you.
6. Watch your attitude.
7. Try to keep a sleep schedule.

A lot of the other tips were good suggestions for overall health, but I guess that there is a direct correlation between health, contentedness, and energy levels. Nobody knows that better than an exhausted, over-worked mom.

Perhaps tomorrow night I’ll get to bed at a decent hour.

It seems that women of all ages and from all walks of life have something in common – lack of sleep. No, it’s not only moms with babies who suffer from sleep deprivation. It’s practically everyone of this gender.

According to a survey by the National Sleep Foundation:

• 60% of women feel they don’t get enough sleep. A few nights of good solid sleep a week were all they can afford.
• 43% of women feel sleepy at daytime and this sleepiness interferes with their daily activities.

There are many reasons why women don’t get enough sleep and these reasons might be physical as well as psychological.

Physical causes of sleep disorders are mainly due to hormones and may include menstrual cramps and hot flashes.

Psychological causes are more complex and not easily identifiable but one is for sure: women tend to worry too much.

Lack of sleep is linked to many health problems including unhealthy weight gain and cardiovascular disorders. Women’s hearts are shown to be more susceptible compared to men’s hearts when it comes to the effects of sleep deprivation.

Sleep experts recommend that “breaking the worry habit” is the best way to improve sleep. One way of doing this is by mindfulness meditation. Another is by preparing a worry list before sleeping. On one side of a piece of paper is a list of all your worries. On the other side are the possible solutions.

You know what? I think I’ll give the worry list technique a try. Good night!

Source: HealthDay News, 22 June 2008

It doesn’t take long after a baby is born for her parents to start thinking “when will she sleep through the night?” OK, it’s more like desperately, feverishly praying and having delusions of exchanging all your worldly possessions for more than 45 minutes of unbroken sleep.

So how long will it take? It depends on your baby. Newborn babies wake up every couple of hours – there is something wrong if they don’t. It’s physically impossible for a baby to have enough milk in her tummy to last all night before 2 or 3 months at the very earliest. Most 6-month-olds don’t sleep through the night. By 9 months, about half of all babies are sleeping through. By one, most babies sleep through the night on most nights. But it’s normal for babies to take until 18 months, or 2 years, to sleep consistently through the night.

Just about every pediatrician I’ve seen for my two-year-old son (moved a lot, changed insurance companies several times, he’s never seen the same doctor more than twice) has asked how he was sleeping.

I wonder if they are just making conversation. Of course a pediatrician should be your first call if there is something medically wrong or troubling with your baby. But sleeping is not a medical problem. And they always say the same thing. Let the baby cry-it-out. (which personally, in my opinion – and not criticizing you if you did it, I understand the desperation – I think is cruel and just could not do.) But what is not a matter of opinion, this is true – cry-it-out is not a one-size-fits-all solution.

Some babies do actually start sleeping better after following a cry-it-out program for a couple of nights, a couple of nights of a few minutes crying and suddenly they’ll sleep for 6 hours instead of 2. Most babies have to do a lot of crying before they start sleeping for longer. And some babies scream and scream and scream. They don’t understand what’s happening, and why mom is not coming to get them.

So it baffles me why pediatricians consistently recommend cry-it-out. Do you know that doctors, including pediatricians, don’t study babies’ sleep in medical school – or at most, one or two classes. So if your doctor is telling you to cry-it-out, then try it if you feel like it may work – and I really hope it does. But if you are trying cry-it-out, and it’s just not working, don’t persever because the pediatrician said to do it. Stop, and try something else.

There’s plenty of books on the market that offer to help, and can give you much better information than your pediatrician. Buy or borrow a couple that approach baby sleep from different viewpoints, and following the advice of the one that best fits your parenting style.

I have friends whose eldest child, a boy, couldn?t seem to sleep through even at age three. And when he napped, well, he?d only be out for 15 minutes max. It was hard for his parents, both of whom were working. I really felt sorry for the mom because even though I had twins, I tended to be less sleep-deprived than her.

Luckily, the boy outgrew his sleeping problems though they never found out what the problem was. Back then, they jokingly complained ?he must have been born without a sleeping gene.? Now 6, he is the typical first grader who doesn?t like to get out of bed in the morning.

But it seems their problems are nothing compared to the parents of 3-year old Rhett Lamb who almost doesn?t sleep at all, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. No wonderful that the boy is constantly crabby and has no appetite.

It took years for medical experts to find out what?s keeping the boy from sleeping. It?s a very rare condition called Chiari Malformation wherein ?the brain literally is squeezed into the spinal column? leading to compression and squeezing of the brain stem. This is the part of the brain where all the vital bodily functions including sleep.

Recently, Rhett underwent an operation to ease the pressure on his ?strangled? brain. This was done by removing the bone surrounding the brain stem and the spinal cord, thus creating more space inside the skull. The effect of the surgery may not be immediately evident but the doctors and parents are hopeful that the boy will soon make a full recovery.

Chiari Malformation is related to Spina Bifida and other neurological disorders. It can manifest in different symptoms or be asymptomatic (without any symptoms). For more information about chiari malformation, check out this Fact Sheet from the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke.

Source:

ABC News, 10 May 2008

It’s normal to feel stressed and overwhelmed when bringing a new baby home. Add to that hormone fluctuations and the fact that you’re recovering, and being a new mom can feel like a huge undertaking. Following are some ways to take care of yourself after the new baby arrives.

First, remember that you’re not the only one to feel like this. You may be feeling exhausted, worn out and less than sane, or a combination of these. It’s a phase – like all things, it’s temporary. Your baby will begin to sleep through the night. You will get more sleep. You will get through it. Knowing that you’re not alone can help to bring a light to the situation and help make things better, or at least more tolerable. Talk to other new moms, find a support group in your area, or even talk to your own mom for reassurance and support.

Second, get enough rest. ‘Sleep when your baby sleeps’ isn’t just something people say – it’s advice worth following. When your baby naps, try laying down and resting. Even if you don’t sleep, a little down time can help you to relax and refresh for the rest of the day. Also, try going to bed when your little one does, at least once in a while. If your baby’s in bed by 8 p.m., try going to bed shortly afterward (even if it’s still light out and you have mountains of laundry to do). Get the rest you need, and those nights where you are up late won’t seem so bad.

Third, don’t be afraid to ask for help. You don’t have to do it alone – ask for help. Ask a neighbor or friend to baby sit, even just for a half hour, so that you can take a nap or go to the grocery store. Most people would be more than willing to help out a new mom – and to spend time with a new baby!

Finally, take some time for yourself. Take a walk, go to the library and check out a book or DVD, or go get your nails done. Even just a half hour of ‘me’ time can help make you feel better and put things into perspective. Remember, you’re a woman too – not just a mom.

I’ve had to revisit the issue of sleep training again, an issue I once thought of as solved. You see before we left for the greener pastures of California, to start my life as a new SAHM, Mina had her sleeping pattern down to a routine we both could live with. She was down by 8 pm, slept anywhere from 5-7 hours, woke up for a night feeding and then down again for another few hours until she was up for good at 7ish.

Now we’re week 1 into our life in California, and her crib has yet to make an appearance. She has had to sleep with me in bed, and some very bad patterns are emerging. She will not fall asleep unless I cradle her. I just can’t pull her blankie over her and lie down on my own space. She has to be cradled. If she wakes up and I’m not skin to skin with her, she starts crying. I’m sure this extra clinginess is also attributable to the fact that there’s just too many new things bombarding her, and she’s clinging to the most familiar: me.

I don’t know what battles will face me when I try to get her to independently sleep in her crib like she had been happy to do back in our old home. I pray to the sleeping gods it is short-lived or non-existent. Non-existent would probably be too good to be true.

Her crib arrives tomorrow. We shall see then.

Sleep, blessed sleep. We definitely need to have enough. We all know what sleep deprivation feels like. But can too much of a good thing ? such as sleep ? turn bad? Apparently, yes, it goes both ways. Too little or too much sleep can result in health problems ? such as extra pounds that we don`t want or need.

A Canadian study studied the sleeping habits of 276 people over 6 years categorized into:

? Short sleepers (5 to 6 hours per night)
? Long sleepers (9 to 10 hours per night)
? Average sleepers (7 to 8 hours per might)

And their results:

? 35% of short sleepers are more likely to gain weight (about 11 lbs) than average sleepers.
? 25% of long sleepers gain the same number of pounds compared to average sleepers.
? Short sleepers add 124% more body fat and 58% around the waist than average sleepers.

The link between sleep and weight gain is due to fluctuating hormone levels.

Americans are sleeping less and less compared to 40 years ago. This trend, coupled with others research studies, indicates that sleep can be a contributing factor in the increasing rate of obesity.

No wonder I couldn`t get rid of those extra pregnancy pounds. I wasn`t just getting enough sleep!

Source:

MedicineNet.com 1 April 2008

My daughter gave up taking naps right around the time she was poised to turn two years old. This may not have been such a big deal, but it was right around the time her baby brother was born and I really could have used an hour or two to myself during the day…or at least some time to only deal with one kid at a time. I initially fought the idea of her giving up her nap, but I eventually realized that she knew her needs better than I did when it came to naps, so instead we turned nap time into resting time. Nowadays she’ll do art projects or watch TV while her brother naps.

He’s approaching two and a half, and still no sign up giving up naps. Hallelujah for small favors.

The way I see it, there are some pros and cons to when your toddler gives up naps:

Pro: My daughter started going to bed earlier at night, and had less trouble falling asleep.

Con: After a busy day when my daughter really could have used a nap, she would refuse and then be a crankypants until she went to bed.

Pro: We no longer had to make sure that we were home by a certain time during the day for her nap, and this opened up our schedule quite a bit.

Con: If you’re anything like me, there are some days when you just can’t wait until nap time so you can rest/do housework/catch up on e-mails. When she gave up nap time I lost my “Me” time.

I know some moms who fight the nap issue tooth and nail until their kids head off to kindergarten. I’ve just tried to work with my daughter’s innate needs for sleep as best I can, and I’m counting my blessings that my son still dozes for a while every day.

When I was pregnant, I read many baby books on the trials and joys of parenting a newborn. I received many warnings from books, and friends, about the sleepless nights ahead. In the process, I came across the much-debated Ferber Method of sleep-training your baby and the approach of Attachment Parenting.

The first method is basically leaving your baby awake in their crib at night, following a bedtime ritual, letting them cry, and never picking them up for any reason (unless they’re hurt or endangered I suppose) so they can learn to soothe themselves to sleep. You are allowed to check in on the baby at intervals to pat them only. It’s a controversial method that many Attachment Parenting (AP) followers decry. A lot of AP parents, and even those who don’t label themselves as such, believes it traumatizes the child. But many parents swear by it.

When I first read of the Ferber Method, and saw a video of a set of parents trying this method, I immediately said that this was not a method for me. I vowed never to let my baby cry it out. Fast-forward to seven months and many sleepless nights later, I can see why some parents would try it.

To contrast it with AP beliefs however, here are some key differences:

• Parents should respond to the children’s needs at night just like they do during the day
• Explore the variety of different sleeping arrangements, and choose the approach that allows you to best be responsive at night
• Remain flexible, and understand that it is developmentally appropriate and normal for babies and children to wake during the night
• Infant solitary sleep is a relatively new practice that has evolved only in the last 100 years, and co-sleeping is highly encouraged

AP parents point out that “cultures where parents routinely sleep with their children report some of the lowest SIDS rates, and in some of these cultures SIDS is non-existent”.

Dr. Ferber however, though slightly less rigid in the past about co-sleeping, still advocates establishing the baby’s independence early on in a separate crib, preferably in a separate room. And the Ferber Method definitely revolves around this assumption that the baby will be in their own crib in a separate room.

After reading extensively on both methods, I have decided to reject both labels. So many parents are already confused, not knowing which expert to believe. I was one of them, until I found that so many so-called experts are constantly coming up with conflicting results in studies.

I don’t happen to like Dr. Ferber’s rigidity, but I also don’t like being labeled and AP parent. I’m a mom. I’m Mina’s mom. We have our own routine, our own challenges, and our own unique individual baby. We do what works for us, as ultimately all parents must do.

My baby alternates co-sleeping with me and going to her crib which is in our room. I grew up that way so this method feels natural. This “independence early on” is a strangely U.S. phenomenon, though a few countries in Western Europe also practice it (at least according to a friend living in France).

I nurse, and depending on how I feel, she goes to her crib at the foot of our bed, or sleeps in between my husband and me. Sometimes I pray to the sleeping gods that she finally sleep straight until morning, because she still nurses twice a night. However, when I’m nursing her, I remember that she will not be a baby forever, and once she’s weaned and sleeping like a normal person, I will lament the fact that she’s –well– weaned and we don’t get to bond as much.

However, if it ever got to the point that I couldn’t function normally anymore because of sleep-deprivation, I certainly would not look down on the Ferber Method. But no matter what I do, I will always be listening to MY gut feelings, staying in tuned with my daughter’s progress, and then adjusting and tweaking where needed.

Besides, this sleeping thing won’t be a problem for long. Who knows of a school-age kid that isn’t a drag to wake up the morning after all? And by the teen years, most of our kids would sleep till noon if they could.

Related Post: Solutions To Help Baby Sleep

As I toss and turn through long, uncomfortable nights in my eighth month of pregnancy, anything related to sleep and sleep deprivation seems to be catching my attention. This news regarding poor sleep in women was released last Friday:

A Duke University study has shown that women suffer more heart-related health problems which are related to poor sleep than men do.

The study found that poor sleep is associated with psychological distress and markers which are related to type 2 diabetes and heart disease, and that the risk is higher in women. It included 210 healthy middle-aged women and men without any history of diagnosed sleep disorders. None of them smoked or took any daily medications.

The participants filled out sleep questionnaires and gave blood samples which were analyzed for levels of biomarkers which suggest an increased risk of diabetes and heart disease.

About 40% of those in the study were classified as poor sleepers, either having frequent problems falling asleep or awakening during the night. In women, poor sleep was found to be strongly associated with high levels of stress, feelings of hostility, depression and anger. The same link was not found for men.

Also, women who were poor sleepers were found to have higher levels of C-reactive protein and interleukin-6; both are bio-chemical markers which are associated with an increased risk of diabetes and heart disease.

An interesting finding was that it is not so much the overall poor quality of a woman?s sleep which is associated with her increased risk of heart disease. Instead, an inability to fall asleep quickly was shown to have the strongest link to an increased risk of heart disease.

A larger percentage of women vs. men, in general, report suffering from sleep problems. Add this to the fact that most women suffer with sleep trouble at least at some point during their pregnancies, and are most often the ones to awaken to attend to their babies during the night. Women need to be aware of the seemingly ever-growing list of health problems which are related to sleep deprivation. They need to make sleep a priority, even if it means taking time out to rest or take a nap. When a woman is sleep-deprived, she needs to remind herself that things like the dishes and laundry can wait-her health is much more important.

One of the best bits of advice I received when I was pregnant was to make the time before bedtime as predictable as possible. The theory is that a predictable series of events before bedtime is just what your baby needs to realize that it’s almost time for sleep. It’s supposed to be much better than just abruptly swooping up your baby and plopping him or her into the crib. Babies need a little notice before winding their little clocks down.

This has always worked well for us. Our ritual was the same for our son that it was for our daughter:

1. Take a bath
2. Read a story
3. Say our prayers
4. Go to sleep.

I usually use bathtime as a way for my babies to not only realize that bedtime is imminent, but also to allow them the means by which to work out any residual energy before heading to sleep. As my kids got a little older I allowed them to pick out the stories we read at night, and now they’re both at an age where they can recite their own prayers. The kids know that once the prayers are said, there’s no going back because it’s sleepy time.

When should you start a bedtime ritual? I’ve always had one with my kids, and it has always worked really well. My advice is to start developing a ritual as soon as possible, because the sooner your baby realizes that a certain series of events always leads up to sleep, the better off you’ll be.