Looking after two kids, including one toddler who is smack in the middle of the terrible twos, and a daycare baby who wants everything the toddler has, means that there are a lot of tearing out hair moments in my house.

Like when Toddler pleads for mashed potatoes for lunch, then won’t touch them. Or when Daycare Baby and Toddler want the exact same toy. Or when Toddler wants to pour milk on Daycare Baby. Or when Daycare Baby crawls through Toddler’s block project, knocking it down. Or Toddler wants to put Daycare Baby in the trash. Or Daycare Baby touches Toddler and Toddler collapses on the floor wailing how much it hurts.

There’s the odd moment of peace, like when one or both of them are napping, but there are plenty of times where I have to do some deep breathing.

A couple of days ago, Daycare Baby was having her nap. “Where’s Baby?” asks Toddler, over and over again. I’m imagining that he wants her to get up so he can try to bop her with a plastic frying pan or lift her up by her feet. But no.

So when Daycare Baby wakes up, she spots Toddler. Big grin and squeals of joy! Toddler sees Daycare Baby. Big grin! Squeals of joy!  Toddler runs towards Daycare Baby, Daycare Baby can’t crawl towards Toddler fast enough, Toddler and Daycare Baby hug and squeal with delight to see each other again. It’s been a whole 45 minutes!

I’m thoroughly heart warmed. Then five minutes later, Daycare Baby snatches Toddler’s truck, Toddler wails and starts throwing things and screaming. Sigh. But like I said, the cute moments outweigh the crazy ones. I love my kids!

I just got my son into bed. I think I need a large glass of red wine, it’s been a long day.

He’s almost three and some days he still naps, some days he doesn’t. It depends on how well he slept the night before, how busy a morning we had, what time he got up in the morning, and some random toddler factor. Most of the time, when we go out in the morning he’ll nap in the afternoon. Or if we are at home in the morning, he won’t nap and he’ll be fine.

Then there are the days when we have a busy morning but he won’t nap. These days are much less fine. Take today, for example. We went to the children’s museum in our town, full of bubble tanks, slides, play houses, mice, and other crazy fun excitement for the under fives.  After playing  for an hour, Daycare Baby did exactly as she was supposed to and fell asleep in her sling around her naptime so I carried her around the museum while she slept.

Toddler was having too much fun to stop. Daycare Baby woke up, we all had lunch, then back to playing. All of a sudden it was well past his naptime and I could see the overtired, hyperactive look in Toddler’s eyes.  Enter the challenge of getting him home without a tantrum, or at least not too much of a tantrum.

The trouble with overtired babies and toddlers is that they can be so cute. They don’t want to stop to sleep and they know that being adorable and funny makes mom or dad laugh and can delay the inevitable nap. Toddler is singing and dancing and laughing and hugging me and entertaining Daycare Baby and telling all the other girl toddlers in the museum that he likes their dresses.

When Daycare Baby is overtired she’s adorable, cooing and blowing kisses and hugging the dog. Then trying to get her to sleep is an exercise in tearing out your hair.

I bumped into one of our friends and her toddler, trying to get her son to leave too. Realizing that if one toddler detonated, the other one would go to (like dynamite) we created a distraction and separated them. Soon I hear a tantrum in the lobby although that could be any one of the overtired toddlers in the place.

We do manage to get towards the door, and Toddler starts whining. We go for our coats, and Toddler starts trying to run back to the exhibits. I catch him and the inevitable wailing begins. We do manage to get out with a fairly minor tantrum then he almost falls asleep on the bus home. It’s not a long enough ride for a decent sleep so I have to wake him up, more wailing, then it’s far too late to take a nap and I have to deal with an overtired toddler for the couple of hours before bedtime.

Typical overtired toddler: we have shouting, slapping, pinching, spitting, annoying the dog, refusing to read books or do anything quiet, ignoring me, shouting NO! if I ask him anything, wailing if Daycare Baby touches any of his things, and general hyperactive obnoxious behaviour.

At least bedtime was an hour earlier than normal! Where’s my corkscrew?

This is really my fault for not keeping a closer eye on the time, I should have foreseen this kind of afternoon after a busy morning and no nap. Sometimes things get away from us busy moms though, and we are all going to deal with overtired babies and toddlers from time to time.

But the most important thing to remember if you are dealing with an overtired baby or toddler is that sleep will remedy everything. A good nap or a good night’s sleep, and your manic infant will become his or her sweet self again, and all will be back to normal.

My almost three-year-old son is giving up his nap. Sigh. On the days where he naps, he’s wide awake at bedtime, past bedtime, way past bedtime, and is still trying to jump on the bed and sing songs about weasels at 9.30pm. A few cranky afternoons excepted, he’s a happy little chap all day when he doesn’t nap. I am currently in mourning for my afternoon sleep/internet surfing session/occasional housework binge.

After having a newborn who sleeps randomly, it’s nice when baby settles into more or less of a routine of three or four naps a day. By six months, babies usually need two naps a day at fairly regular times and moms start to relax (just a little) that they have gotten the hang of this nap business.

Bar teething and colds and other things that disrupt napping, the two-nap period is usually a fairly predictable one that moms can plan other activities around, like playdates, appointments and going to the store.

Then, just once you think you have a handle on napping, it all changes. Around when babies turn one, they decide that they only need one nap a day. I have a friend who’s son quit napping altogether at 9 months and another friend with a 16-month-old who still naps twice a day, so that date is subject to change.

The transition from two naps to one can be rough. There’s mornings when baby denies that she is tired. Then is too tired to fall asleep, has a 20 minute nap and is grumpy/hyper until she crashes in the afternoon. Or baby will nap beautifully in the morning, then be wide eyed all the rest of the day, go to bed early, then wake up extremely early, and her naps the next day are thrown off. Or any other permutations of refusing to nap, napping at odd times, random nap lengths and all that kind of fun.

The two-naps-to-one transition can take a couple of weeks to get through, and oftentimes nighttime sleep is disturbed too, as baby is probably not getting the rest she needs during the day, or might be getting more than she needs and isn’t as tired at night.

The good news? Once babies settle into the one nap routine, they tend to nap for longer. A two hour afternoon nap seems to be a common pattern, and is bliss after the 40-minute naps of before. It’s the perfect length for mom to have a nap too, watch a couple of TiVo’d episodes of Lost, or surf the internet. You thought you were the only one? Internet page views have a spike mid-afternoon and I’m guessing that’s a whole load of moms emailing, hitting facebook, writing their blogs and even visiting this site (thank you) while baby naps. So I think you’ll agree that the aggravation in making the transition is well worth it.