I know I’m not the only one with a big age difference between kids. My older boys are 2 ½ years apart but our little guy is 8 and 11 years younger than his big brothers. Last night, at a soccer function for our older boys, I spoke with 2 other moms with kids of similar ages. One, however, has 12 children, spanning between the ages of 7 months to 18 years! Crazy, I know. Our entire community does not know how a family of this size manages in this day and age.

There’s the good and then there’s the not so good. I was thrilled when my 11 year old carefully put the baby in his car seat, strapped him in and proceeded to snap the seat correctly into its base in the car. (His future wife will be impressed!). I love that the boys can keep an eye on the baby while I shower or cook, hold his bottle for him and read to him. There has been little trouble with their transition to becoming good siblings.

I love how excited the little guy gets when his brothers come home from school—he already looks up to them. This puts expectations on the older boys, though. They will be treated as role models or examples for a much younger brother. I already “shush” them when something unsavory comes out of their mouths. I tell my almost 12-year old that I do not want the baby’s first words to be some naughty phrase that a bunch of middle schoolers spew at each other when the teacher’s not listening. I don’t want to hear any foul language in the house at all, but with the baby in the picture, I’m much more concerned about it.

The boys are nice kids (well, most of the time) and do well in school and sports. So for the most part, I think they are already decent role models. On the downside of the age gap, we used to be able to hike and take long bike rides on our beach vacations. Now, at least for awhile, these things are no longer possible with baby on board. Occasionally, we used to go to live shows and concerts. These events now require getting a sitter for the baby for several hours (and babysitters around here are paid well!).

My husband I used to be able to sleep in, while the boys played, watched tv, or even slept in, too. Now we’re on the baby’s sleep schedule, and he’s always up early. I must say, though, that my husband is pretty good about letting me sleep in on weekends, when our schedules allow it.

We’ll be dealing with potty-training again in a couple of years, which could make trips to the store or movies trickier…On the bright side, my oldest son will then be almost 14 and capable of taking the little guy to the potty for me.

There are pros and there are cons. But I’ve always tried to see the cup as being “half full”. While my oldest son no longer believes in Santa and my middle son is teetering in the middle of belief and disbelief, we have many exciting years ahead of us to enjoy the magic of Santa Claus through our third child’s eyes. I’ll keep trying to focus on the positive. Before I know it, our little boy will be a big boy, too.

Everyone knows what the policy is in China when it comes to having children. It’s tough to judge them too harshly I guess, as they have to find some means of controlling their population. I sometimes wonder though just how far the Chinese government is willing to take it. With the world population continuing to grow, many people speculate that we are on our way to not being able to sustain it. I’m not too big on Doomsday theories myself, but is it possible that other nations may soon impose stricter laws restricting people’s reproductive rights?

Take for example, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar who already have 17 children, with another baby due in January of 2009. With Michelle just 42, there is the real possibility that the Duggars are not done having babies quite yet.

Recently a few celebrities weighed in on the discussion of family size. See who shares your opinion on whether or not a family can be too big.

The View co-host, Whoopi Goldberg feels that nobody has the right to judge. She says, ‘I think it’s to each their own and none of our business. If people want to have 30 kids and can afford it, it’s none of our business. Some people are very wealthy, only have one child and that’s too much for them. Some people have 18 children and they have it together?’

According to The Grand Dame of Dish, Liz Smith, ‘Doesn’t the number of children a family chooses to have fall under the “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” clause? Isn’t it a private matter, so long as a family can cope, care for and control in a healthy manner?’

Actress Lily Tomlin put it this way, ‘I’ve seen it written in information about overpopulation that “People are a good thing. Overpopulation isn’t.’

While it is in fact a private issue, maybe it’s not such a bad idea to view it in the context of the health care system, and programs like welfare. If a family is really able to care for a large number of children that is one thing, but those that aren’t would be forced to rely on others to meet the children’s needs.

What’s your view on this issue? Should any family be criticized for its size?

Having waited so long to have this third baby, I am dealing with a newborn on the way, an eight-year old and a pre-adolescent 11 year old. What a spread!

Several months ago, I bought a book for my 10 (not yet 11) year old, called “The What’s Happening Body Book for Boys”. He smiled, thanked me, and tucked it away on his book shelf. Recently, however, he was looking for some joke books and pulled out the “Body” book. He started to skim through it, chuckling at some of the very accurate diagrams of the male and female anatomies. He looked at me cross-eyed when he came across the diagram of the female internal reproductive organs.

I have always used the proper terms for human body parts with my kids, so he uses them comfortably, as he should. I mean-everybody’s got either one version or the other of ‘private parts’. I think he feels pretty comfortable, albeit at times a bit embarrassed, about discussing certain things with his mom. The same is true, of course, for my younger son. I think it’s important for children to feel comfortable and normal about their bodies.

So, here we go, before I know it, my oldest son might actually smell after soccer practice and start to sprout hairs in new places. At the same time, I’ll be dealing with a baby’s sleeping, teething and digestive issues. I could be dealing with acne and diaper rash at the same time! It’s exhausting, thinking of living through so many developmental stages at the same time, through my three children. Having two in diapers several years ago made sense, but soon I will be dealing with kids between the ages of 0 and 11. It’s overwhelming in a different way than it was with an infant and toddler.

As people have pointed out, though, my boys will be very helpful with the baby-keep an eye on him if I’m busy, entertain him, fetch me a diaper or teething ring if I need it. By the time the baby is 3, my oldest will be fourteen: a built-in babysitter! (although, I promise not to take advantage of this too much).

When I’m exhausted, I can sleep in or lie down with baby and know that my older guys can occupy themselves and stay out of trouble. Overall, I think it will be easier than having two little ones close in age.

I’ve never been one to do things in a conventional sort of way; to follow any unwritten rules that seem to be followed by the majority of people I meet. Different plans work for different people. Many people reminisce about when their children were younger and miss those sweet days. I guess I’m just crazy enough to actually go back in time and experience those days again. I second-guess myself often for being careless enough to get pregnant again at this stage-but there’s no turning back now. Life is short and I have to remind myself that the new little guy who’s about to enter our lives was destined to be part of our family. I don’t think life is meant be micro-managed and controlled every step of the way. Sometimes you’ve just got to sit back and enjoy the ride!

Choosing birth control is hard. And for new moms, especially breastfeeding moms, it’s even harder. With all the warnings in the news lately, it makes moms wonder what’s the best choice for them.

A growing number of mothers are turning to an all-natural method, called Natural Family Planning, or NFP.

If you charted when you were trying to conceive, you already know how to do it. The same charting methods of tracking your basal body temperature, and especially cervical fluid, are used to determine when you ovulate, and around ovulation, you abstain, or use a barrier method.

The premise is, there are only a couple of days during your cycle when you can get pregnant. You ovulate once in a cycle, and the egg lives at most 2 days. Before you ovulate, and after the egg has gone, then you cannot get pregnant.

This method has some wonderful advantages. It’s almost free, it needs nothing more than pen and paper, an optional thermometer, and a couple of moments of your time a day. It’s very eco-friendly – no pill packets, and no peeing out synthetic hormones and turning all the local fish into 3 eyed hermaphrodites (kidding). There’s no medication so it’s very compatible with breastfeeding. It’s also compatible with faiths that disapprove of birth control. There’s nothing to interfere with lovemaking when you are not ovulating, and many couples feel that the advantages outweighs having to abstain or use condoms for a couple of days mid-cycle.

Disadvantages are that the method takes some time to learn. You really need to understand the principle if it’s to work, and you will probably have to chart several cycles before you’ll feel confident you won’t get pregnant. It took me several cycles to start understanding my chart, but now it takes literally seconds a day. You’ll also need the discipline to chart every day – but it’s barely any more work than popping a pill.

I use this method because I don’t want any more artificial hormones, foreign object or implants in my body. A bonus for me is that I now have a greater understanding of what my body is doing every cycle, and it’s pretty awesome what your body actually does! Another neat advantage is that once we decide to try for No. 2, we’ll know exactly what day to go for it!

My bible of Natural Family Planning, which explains everything you need to know (and also a must read for anyone trying to conceive, women with questions about their cycles, and just about anyone with a womb) is a book called Taking Charge of your Fertility, by Toni Weschler.

It’s everything you’ll need to know about NFP, and a must read if you are interested in following this method. There were several places in this book where I exclaimed – so that’s why that happens! Or that’s why I feel like that! I highly recommend it.