In an industrialized world, we are surrounded by electromagnetic fields (EMF). In the last decade, the health effects of EMF have been intensively studied especially in connection with mobile phones and cancer. Less studied but nonetheless very important are the possible effects of EMF on the unborn child.

One group which has been active in studying the effects of EMF on pregnancy are consists of researchers from the Kaiser Foundation Research Institute in Oakland, California. In 2002, they studied women who were residents of San Francisco and less than 10 weeks pregnant. The study participants were given an EMF-measuring meter to be worn for 24 hours. The results showed that exposure to EMF during the first 10 weeks of pregnancy, and above a certain threshold (approximately 16 mG) is associated with a higher risk for spontaneous abortion or miscarriage.

A more recent report by researchers at McGill University, Montreal gives even more troubling news. The study looked at 548 cases of childhood brain tumors and reviewed the extremely low frequency of electromagnetic fields (ELF-EMF) exposure of the mothers before and during pregnancy. ELF is the EMF that comes from power lines and electrical appliances. The study showed that many pregnant women were exposed to ELF at work (example: sewing machine operators). This exposure translated to an increased risk in brain tumor development in their babies.

Exposure to EMF happens everyday and it is almost impossible to avoid it even if you try. Many of us can’t live with our mobile phones, our black berries, our laptop, or the microwave oven. I remember when I was pregnant with my twins and bedridden, I used my laptop while lying/sitting in bed. I didn’t know about EMF then, though I tried to cover my tummy with a pillow or a thick blanket, hoping the machine wouldn’t harm my babies. Knowing what I know now, I would have taken more precautionary measures.

I remember my baby shower for my first daughter.  I got the cute “safety” kit.  It had a nail trimmers, a nasal aspirator and a medicine dropper.  I felt like I could conquer the world with that kit.  Then my child arrived.  I was afraid to trim her nails lest I hurt her.  That nasal aspirator thing was just gross and the medicine dropper…well…that didn’t even work.

Fifteen years have gone by.  None of my children have lost fingers due to nail trimmers.  Their nostrils are not permanently enlarged due to that nasal aspirator.  I’ve finally learned how to give medication to my children and you know, I don’t even use the medicine dropper.

Some of my children didn’t really mind taking medication.  That was wonderful.  Then I had my son, who HATES medicine.  If I squirt the medicine too far back in his mouth or if I give him too much at a time, he’s been known to throw up just from gagging.  What have I learned?  A whole bunch of things.

There are many different products out there actually designed to help medicate your child.  I’ve seen specially designed bottles and also pacifiers designed to cleverly sneak medicine into your child.  I’d suggest trying these things because they may work for your child.

I found that my son, even at a young age, wasn’t fooled when medicine came out of the pacifier.  He also wasn’t fooled by mixing the medicine with juice in his bottle.  The thing that I didn’t like about these methods: how long can you let the medicine out before it is just not good to ingest anymore?  For example, suppose it takes an hour for your child to drink the medicine/formula mix?  Suppose it takes longer? Suppose your baby goes on a formula strike and refuses to drink the mix? Then what?

I’ve found that it’s best to actually just get through the whole thing as quickly as possible.  I’ve also found that it helps to have someone assist you if you have a child or an infant who really doesn’t like taking medication.

The plastic medicine plungers available at the drug store work great!  Usually pharmacists will give you extras if you ask politely.  I like them better than a medicine dropper.

In order to give medicine to your baby or young child, it’s best to lie them on their back.  Have a spouse or friend gently hold their hands down and talk to the child or try to distract him or her. Gently hold your child’s head (it’s hard to give medicine to a child who is twisting their head back and forth) and put the plunger diagonal into your child’s mouth.

The plunger should be aimed towards the back of the child’s mouth towards their cheek.  Don’t aim too far back or your child will gag and possibly throw the medicine up.  If you aim to far front, it’s easy for the child to just spit out the medicine.  Don’t push all of the medicine into your child at one time.  Gradually squirt in the medicine a little at a time.  This way, if some of the medicine gets spit out, at least your child will have some sort of medicine in their stomach.  If your child gags easily, this will keep him from gagging too.

Another tip: I have found that my son actually takes medicine better now that I have begun to flavor his medicines.  It really does work!

With some practice,  the help of your spouse, and some flavored medicine, you should be able to give medicine to even the most “difficult” of children.  Good luck!

Throughout my life I’ve gone through phases where I write poetry. Unlike other writing, which is a job, I find it relaxing, more like a game. My daughter just turned four months old, and I realized I still hadn’t written a poem for her.

I’m happy that the Babies Online site  owner has permitted me to share some of my poems, here, and I hope that other moms will relate to the themes. Maybe some Babies Online readers or fellow bloggers would like to share their own creative writing, too?

Milestones, Memories and “Mom-guilt”

I want to capture every memory
In poetry, pictures and prose
My every thought, your every step
Recorded for you to know.

The way your whole face smiles
When Daddy looks at you
And how you want to cuddle–
With us the whole night through.

But diapers and feedings and peek-a-boo
Leave little time for introspection
And as I hold you close I pray
I’m leading you in the right direction.

I wonder years from now
If you’ll look back and see
So many blank pages in your baby book
And wish I’d done it differently

When souvenirs of your youth are scarce
You’ll want to know the truth.
I should have taken time to write it down–
But I was too busy loving you.

]]> http://blogs.babiesonline.com/baby/milestones-memories-and-mom-guilt/feed/ 2 http://blogs.babiesonline.com/baby/grandparenting-from-a-distance/ http://blogs.babiesonline.com/baby/grandparenting-from-a-distance/#comments Wed, 11 Feb 2009 20:30:20 +0000 Dawn Allcot http://blogs.babiesonline.com/?p=9257

My daughter has only two living grandparents. She is also blessed to have two great-grandmothers, as well, and with the longevity on my husband’s side of the family, I’m pretty sure they will live long enough for her to remember them. I knew only one of my grandparents and none of my great-grandparents, so I’m happy my daughter has this opportunity.

However, both her Grammy and her Grandpa (both on my husband’s side) live out of state. This breaks her their hearts that they can’t get to see Ashley growing up, but we make the best of it.

Since Ashley was born, I’ve grown closer to my mother-in-law, and try to stay in touch with frequent phone calls. After all, she is the one person I know who loves to hear every single detail of Ashley’s day and the new things she does. Since I love talking about my baby, it’s a perfect match!

I try to take pictures at every milestone, including monthly birthdays. I upload them to the computer and e-mail my mother-in-law the albums. Photos are one way to keep in touch, but with today’s technology, there are many ways to help long distance grandparents (and other relatives) stay in touch with their growing grandchildren. Best of all, none of these ideas take a lot of time or cost a lot of money!

1. If you have your photos processed online, at a site such as Clark prints, you can upload photos and then have them shipped directly to the grandparent’s house. No trip to the post office? No hunting for envelopes and hoping you have the right postage? I can live with that. (Clark Color Labs will give you your first 30 prints for free! – click here for more information)
2. A blog. I just introduced Ashley’s Grammy to this blog as a great place—in addition to my frequent phone calls—to stay up-to-date on the developments in Ashley’s life. New moms can easily set up their own blog right here at Babies Online, where you can upload photos and stories for friends and relatives  to view.
3. Video. The possibilities to bring babies and grandparents closer are endless when you add video into the mix. You can take video and upload it to Youtube or your Babies Online Web page for people to view. Most digital cameras today have options to record a few minutes of video. Some events to capture in the first months of life include milestones such as baby’s first meal, rolling over, playing with a favorite toy, and even a few seconds of your little angel sleeping.
4. You can set up a Web cam and add another interactive element to phone calls. Since babies love looking at friendly faces, this is a great way for baby to get to know Grandma and Grandpa, maybe even before they meet in person!

Today’s society tends to scatter family members across the globe but fortunately, technology can bring us closer again.

My grandmother tells me that parenting is a grand 25 year experiment and investment.  After 25 years, supposedly, you can see the results of your investment.  My oldest is 15, so I still have a decade left to go before I know if this is true or not.

Do you ever look at your child and wonder?  Do you wonder what he will be like when he “grows up”?  I do.   I worry that my son may decide to be a soldier like his Daddy, his Grandpa, and his Great-Grandpa.  I know it sounds silly, but I was struck with this fact the other day as my husband gave my son a proper “buzz cut” with his military clippers.  Hopefully, by the time my son is old enough to enlist, war will be outlawed.  OK, I know that won’t happen, but I can dream.

Yesterday, my husband was doing some construction work on our house.  Without even thinking, he put down the hammer and our son picked it up, and began banging away.  I noticed that he held the hammer in his left hand, just like my dad.  My dad also happens to be a construction worker.

Several months ago, we had our refrigerator repaired and I noticed that my 1 year old was laying on his belly, watching the repairman look under the refrigerator to see what the problem was.  I was amazed at how he concentrated on that repairman!  My girls wouldn’t have even cared.

It shall be interesting over the coming decades to see what talents and interests our son has.  As we encourage him to explore those interests and talents, I’m sure that it will be an interesting journey.

Do you ever wonder what your baby will be when he or she grows up?

Before I had a baby, everyone told me how much faster life flies by with kids. And I believed them, in the same way someone has never experienced it can. The same way you believe people who say, “Everything changes once you get married,” but you don’t really know what they mean until you unpack after the honeymoon.

On February 12, my daughter will be four months old and I can’t believe it. She feels so new to us yet it also feels like she’s been a part of our lives forever. Life without her is a rapidly fading memory.

Beginning at about 3 months, she’s been learning something new everyday. She’s becoming more aware of our surroundings and more interactive in her dealings with us. She’s selected her favorite cat out of the four who live with us, has definite preferences in toys, and makes her needs clear in ways that don’t always involve crying.

My husband assembled her high chair the other night, and today I put her in it. Our pediatrician said we can start giving her cereal “at any time” now. Breast milk has everything an infant needs for the first six months of life, and I’d love to hold out that long. But my daughter is an eating machine and I don’t know if I can keep up. I’d prefer solids to formula. After two weeks of sleeping through the night, she was up to eat every 2 hours the past two nights. I’m wondering if she’s not hungry for more than milk. She’s also started trying to grab food off my plate and is close to double her birth weight, which are all indicators that she may be ready to start solid foods.

She offered up a big smile when I placed her in the high chair and began looking around the kitchen, as if waiting for some food. “This is your seat now,” I told her. I’m hoping that even if she doesn’t eat her meals with us, I can place her in the high chair to enjoy mealtime as a family. For the first time in three months, I may get to eat with both hands!

She’s also outgrowing her bassinet (it holds up to 15 lbs.) and we have to make the decision to move her to the crib (I’m not ready for that until she’s sleeping through the night steadily!) or into her Pack and Play bassinet in our room temporarily.

This weekend, we may set up her Exersaucer, too, as it’s definitely a challenge to keep her entertained all day.

I got a little teary-eyed thinking about these changes. This is the next stage. My little girl is growing up and in the blink of an eye, she won’t be my little baby anymore. Now I truly understand what parents mean when they say, “It goes so fast.”

I remember finding out on Christmas Day that we were expecting our newest arrival.  I remember calculating due dates and realizing that this child was due to arrive the day after my grandmother’s birthday in August.

We just got word that my grandmother is dying.  She has been ill for a while, but things have taken a dramatic turn for the worse this week.  Tomorrow, our family will make the 800 mile drive north to say goodbye to her.

I last saw my grandmother almost two years ago, when my son was only a few months old.    My grandmother was so proud of her great-grandchildren!  She sat and read them stories and sang to them and we took videos and pictures to document the whole visit.  My sister had also arrived from out of town with her children and all of the cousins had a wonderful time together.

My grandmother does not yet know that we are expecting a child.  I knew that she’d worry about me, and about the baby as I am of “advanced maternal age“.  I thought it best to not worry her.  Will I tell her about her new great-grandchild? Probably not.  This weekend is not about that.

I know this weekend will be hard, but I’ll concentrate on the good times and think of those things.  Death, sadly, is part of life.  I can’t change that.  But I can choose to focus on the positives instead of dwelling on my sadness.

Congratulations to my favorite celebrity couple!  Mom Jennifer, and Dad Ben, both 36, are surely ecstatic at the arrival of Seraphina Rose Elizabeth Affleck .  A spokesperson has announced that Mommy and baby are doing well.

Violet Anne, who is 3 years old, is now a big sister to the darling who arrived Tuesday, Jan. 6th in Los Angeles.  Name and other details have yet to be released but stay tuned for updates.

Rumors about the actress being pregnant were confirmed in August, after months of excited speculation.

As for the first glimpse of the baby?  The couple has no plans on selling photos of Seraphina for first dibs to a magazine or tabloid.

Before I had children, I worked as a therapist in a nursing home which was about a 45 minute drive from my house.  I drove in it all:  snow, sleet, and freezing rain!

Then I had children.

I remember the first time I ever skidded on ice with my children in the van.  I was driving on our country road and slid on “black ice“.  I had skidded and slid around before, but my children were in the car and that was terrifying to me because I realized exactly how much was at stake.

Now, we’ve moved south, and we rarely get even a snow shower.  We occasionally get ice, but most everything closes down when that happens.

If you have to drive in the wintry weather with your baby, be safe and don’t take chances.  If you can delay your drive, do so.  Perhaps you can go into work late once the roads are better cleared.  Perhaps you can work at home that day.

If you have to go out, make sure to carry extra blankets and a shovel.  Leave earlier than usual so you can take extra time to get safely to your destination.  If you are able to do so, you can alter your route to avoid the less traveled roads which may not be so well cleared from snow and ice.

If you get stuck, many times, you can dig yourself out of the snow.  The extra blankets can help to keep your children warm while you are digging.  Kitty litter can be used for extra traction and can help you if you get stuck in the snow or ice.  Studded tires, if they are legal in your area, are a big help when you have to drive in winter weather.

Hopefully, you won’t ever need to use any of these tips!  I wish everyone a safe winter driving season!

Yesterday, I decided to make my first “prenatal appointment”.  I actually found a new OB/GYN for myself and for my developing baby.

I spent last week looking at websites and trying to find a doctor that I felt would be a suitable “match” for our family.  My previous OB/GYN was pretty up front about sharing her negative opinions about the fact that I have a large family(I have children from a previous marriage and now my new husband and I have children as well).  While I appreciate her honesty, I didn’t appreciate the negativity.

Because of my history of bleeding and spotting, I’ll be seeing the new doctor during my 8th week of pregnancy, instead of during my 12th week.  I can download the new patient forms off the internet and fill them out for the first visit.  I am slightly overwhelmed when I see how many forms there are to fill out!  Who ever thought that paperwork was such an important part of a pregnancy?

Other than my husband, I’ve told my sister so far and emailed my best friend.  That’s it.  We’ve decided to wait until I am out of the first trimester before we tell the other children–that is if they don’t already figure it out.  My teens are pretty astute.  My “tweens” aren’t too far behind.  I’m thinking that telling my almost 16 year old that her mother is again expecting should be a very interesting experience!

As we remember 2008 and look forward to all of the wonders that 2009 will hold, I think of the child that we are expecting.  I wonder if our baby will be a boy or a girl? Given my history of miscarriages, I’m not sure I should even be thinking those thoughts yet.  At least not until after the first trimester is over.  Right now, I’m hoping for the best, yet I’m trying to prepare myself should the “worst” happen. Let’s hope that this pregnancy, just like the New Year, will be both safe and full of happiness.  Happy 2009!

Last year, on New Year’s Eve, my family resolved to never travel at Christmas again. That lasted almost a year.

OK. Maybe I should be more specific. We drove 1700 miles one-way. Halfway there, we encountered icy roads and had to cancel a hotel reservation. Annoyed, we dealt with our online reservation system (who can withdraw funds immediately but take two weeks to refund them), and found a new place. Then, on the way back, the same thing happened again. But it was New Year’s Eve and we swore off holiday travel, knowing that flying would have been just as big a problem since the airports were canceling all their flights.

It was an easy resolution to keep since the holidays roll around only once a year. We almost made it all year without breaking the vow. But then Christmas came again. We justified the break by the fact that we were traveling west instead of east, and only 500 miles one way. And instead of being pregnant, we were dragging along an almost-nine month old baby.

That was the first mistake. A couple weeks prior, I tried to “train” her to sleep in other places by using a pack & play. Well, it was a nice sentiment, but she wasn’t buying it. So, for three nights, she barely slept at all, and I’m not exaggerating. Naps were a *little* better. I intended to catch up on a little shut-eye, but with family around that I don’t see often, I really just wanted to be with people. That was, after all, the reason we broke our old resolution. (And it didn’t help my ego that my husband’s cousin has a baby that is only 6 months old who sleeps 12 hours straight through every night! I know it’s an individual thing, but it still made me jealous.)

And then on the way home, we were going to caravan home with my in-laws who live in town with us. But my husband felt compelled to do some last-minute car maintenance, so they took off an hour ahead of us. Lucky for us, since they got turned around on the highway, 150 miles out of town… It wasn’t ice this time, but a rockslide caused by melted snow from the previous week’s winter storm. And in the mountains, there aren’t alternate routes. So they came back while we scoped out the options in town. The short story is that FOUR hours into the trip, we finally were able to leave town! And we still faced another 8 hours with a baby in the car.

All that to say, I REALLY mean it this time when I resolve never to travel again at Christmas. For that matter, maybe I’ll never travel again with a baby.

You’ve seen him before. He is the little baby boy who wears nothing but nappies and a sash with a year written on it. He is called Baby New Year and in a couple of days he will be wearing a sash with “2009″ written on it. Where he comes from, how he came about, or who gave him such a name is not very clear. No one also knows why Baby New Year is always a “he” and never a “she”. Even a search in the Internet does not give us all the answers.

Sometimes people mistake him for a baby angel (a cherub) or a cupid. Baby New Year, however, represents the start of each year, and may be seen on banners during New Year’s celebrations, be it the standard New Year on January 1 or the Chinese New Year a few weeks later. Or in any calendar for that matter. Eventually, as the year loses its “newness”, Baby New Year disappears to be replaced by the symbol of the elderly Father time. The ritual repeats itself at the turn of the year.

One site tells us that the Greeks and the Egyptians used a baby to symbolize rebirth or fertility associated with the New Year. Initially condemned as a paganistic symbol, the Christian religion eventually integrated the Baby New Year symbol into the Christmas tradition featuring child Jesus of the. The Baby New Year symbol was supposedly used by the Germans in the 14^th century and eventually taken to America by immigrants, where the symbol gained popularity.

It is probably the association between New Year and the baby symbol that makes a New Year delivery and the baby that comes with it extra special. You’ll be sure to see headlines on Thursday, January 1, 2009 saying “first baby to be born this year is …”

I remember before I had children, I thought it was strange when I saw mothers who had their children in harnesses out in public.  The idea is that it is easier to keep track of an active child if they are in a baby harness.

When I became a mother, I still thought it was odd.  Then, my toddler got lost one day while we were in Disney World.  I decided to take a bathroom break and asked my parents and my ex to watch the children.  When I returned, only three of our four children were waiting for me!  It turned out that my youngest had slipped away and followed me into the bathroom.  We discovered her a few minutes later, but I swear I sprouted several grey hairs in those minutes.   The next day, I bought a baby harness.

I thought of this today as we were touring Jamestown with my dear friend, her family, and their Belgium exchange student.  Somehow, signals got crossed and everyone thought that the other person was watching the toddler. Then, panic ensued when we discovered he was missing.  We ran around the exhibits for a few minutes, calling for him in English, French, and German.  He yelled back in English and we were able to find him.

The entire event lasted again, only a few minutes.  This time, I’ve got too many grey hairs to tell if I’ve sprouted any new ones.  As I hugged my son, my youngest, who herself had gotten lost in Disney almost a decade ago, remarked loudly–”SOMEBODY needs to get a baby harness!”

Have you used a baby harness to keep your active toddler close to you in public? Would you ever use such a product?

The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) says that it plans to study the effects of BPA in depth in the future.  Currently, the FDA says that BPA’s are safe.  According to experts, the FDA bases this on the results of two studies done by other groups.  These studies, which were funded by chemical industries, claim that BPA’s are safe.

The National Toxicology Program has determined from it’s research that BPA’s, even in small amounts, can cause changes in brain development and behavior in infants and small children.  BPA’s are most easily ingested when chemicals from plastic containers seep into food and drink.

I became concerned about this when I saw an article that the bottles that I’d used for my son had a high concentration of BPA’s.  I began to try to find products without the chemical and was shocked at the lack of choices I found.  Many companies that made infant bottles weren’t even forthcoming with information it seemed.

Several months have passed and while strolling down the baby aisle last week, I noticed several products that actually announced that their product was BPA free.  I bought several BPA free products that day for my son.

Call me cynical, but I don’t buy the FDA’s position that this chemical is safe.  I’m grateful that I now have choices for safer products to purchase for my son.

Do you seek out products that advertise that they are BPA free? Do you agree with the FDA that this chemical is safe?

Last year was my son’s first Christmas.  He got to see Santa several times during the Christmas season as part of our holiday traditions.  Santa appeared at my daughter’s school during a special breakfast; and he arrived at our house one night to ask the children what they wanted for the holiday.

When Santa came to our house, our son was just mesmerized! He just sat and stared.  At least he didn’t cry!  When our son saw Santa at the school breakfast, he was curious.  He pulled his beard down and grabbed a handful of whiskers!  Even Santa laughed at that one.

I assumed that this year my son would also enjoy his visit to Santa because he’d done so well last year.  My assumptions were wrong.  We took our son to see Santa and when he sat down on Santa’s lap, I saw his little chin start to quiver.  The ladies in the elf costumes tried to re-direct him and I smiled my best smile.  My son would look at me and smile and then turn to Santa and begin to cry.

The experienced elves were able to take a photo nevertheless and we were done.  I went up on the platform, picked up my son, and told him he did a wonderful job.  My son took one last look at Santa and began to cry.

In talking to other parents, I found out that “Santa phobias” are not that uncommon.  It seems that many children go through a stage where they are frightened by characters in costume.  This includes people in Santa costumes and people dressed up as amusement park characters.  I’ve found that the best way to handle “Santa phobia” is to make the visit short and sweet.  If my children were very scared, I just cut the visit short and left.  I’ve seen parents trying to cajole their child who was screaming in fear to sit for a photo.  In my mind, it’s not worth the emotional trauma to the child–there’s always next year!

Do you take your children to get their picture with Santa?  How do you handle the situation if your child is scared?

The hospital where I had my daughter Ashley Lyn permitted “rooming in” for both the newborn and the daddy. I was surprised to note that my husband was one of very few who stayed overnight that first night. I insisted he go home to rest the second night.

In those first 24 hours following my daughter’s birth, my husband and I, as brand new parents, had a lot to learn. We’d never fed a baby, diapered a baby…  I’m not sure if he’d ever held a baby that small until the midwife placed Ashley in his arms.

Two months later, we’ve probably changed close to 1000 diapers, but that first one remains embedded in my memory. I don’t remember the time, but it was probably very early that first morning. Ashley started crying — for the first time since she was born.  “Maybe she needs a new diaper?” my husband suggested. He carried her to the bassinet and together, we unfastened the diaper from around this wiggling, crying bundle. Sure enough, it was dirty, and we both smiled. Not only was my husband’s “guess” right, but this also meant the breastfeeding was going well — through all our struggles, she was getting colostrum to help her grow. I ran to the sink to moisten one of the soft paper towels the hospital provides as wipes for newborns and handed it to my husband. As he wiped the thick substance from her butt, we realized one would not do the job.  I moistened another wipe and together, we cleaned her off. Then he lifted her butt while I slid the diaper underneath, and we each fastened one tab.

The last time I had changed a diaper was approximately 16 years ago. I also remember the first diaper I ever changed, on my niece, who was a very young toddler at the time. I had put the diaper on backwards, and my sister still teases me about it! I smiled as I thought about this as I paid careful attention this time, mindful that the Sesame Street characters went in the front.  My hands were shaking with every motion.

I remember a nurse coming in and watching us, marveling at the new parents working together. She politely waited until we were done to talk to us, and laughed when I told her it was our “first diaper change.” By the time we were done, the baby had stopped crying, too. We looked at each other and smiled. We did it!

It’s hard to believe that was only eight weeks ago. Since then, we’ve changed diapers on rest stop changing tables, in parking lots, on friends’ floors, and hundreds on the changing tables in our bedroom and in the nursery. But changing that first diaper meant so much more than any that followed. It was a small indication, just a hint, that if we worked together, we’d make it through this thing called parenting. Or at least the first few months.

How about you, moms? What experience from your baby’s first days will you always remember?

This post might freak out some people who know me… I have one son but this week I’ve got a new baby. OK, she’s not actually mine, I’m doing daycare for a 8-month-old baby.

I’m hoping that this is going to have lots of the advantages of having a real little sister. I’ve got a baby to play with (she’s so cute!) and she’s light as a feather to carry around (two year olds are heavy) and my son can learn all about caring for another person, and make friends with another child in an environment he’s comfortable in.   And, I didn’t need to get pregnant, I don’t have to pay into her college savings, and I get to give her back to her real mom and dad at the end of the day.

There’s been lots of classic baby-toddler behavior. Baby taking toddler’s toys, toddler getting cross, toddler wanting whatever baby has (cheerios and stage 2 applesauce all around for lunch), toddler insisting that mommy loves him and not the baby, toddler refusing to be quiet when baby needs to nap.  I have new-found respect for moms of more than one baby.

And there’s the cute stuff too. She’s fascinated by him. One of his favorite things to do is to burrow under the comforter then pop out, and she thinks it’s a fantastic peekaboo game. He fetches diapers for her, and when she cries, he says she needs a bottle. And he even gave her a hug today. Then they both managed to nap at almost the same time, so there was 30 minutes of peace while baby and toddler were both asleep. Bliss!

We’ve had just one week together so far, so everyone is still getting used to the situation, but I’m really hoping that it works out for everyone. Please keep your finger’s crossed for us!

My baby girl is like many other 8-month old babies. She scoots around on her belly, squeals at the cat, giggles when we play peek-a-boo, and loves to empty the Tupperware cabinet. Unfortunately, she also has some other favorite playthings.

Literally, the day she first started “crawling” (if that’s what it could be properly called), my daughter reached out to touch what she’d been looking at for months. What is at perfect eye level with every baby in a bouncer, or sitting on her own? The electrical outlets, of course. Before she was mobile, I never had them covered. Of course, I went out right away and bought some safety caps. I bought some that were almost clear so they wouldn’t look so garish in the living room. But since they are clear, the girl doesn’t necessarily realize they are there. So she scoots over, lifts herself up and tries to suck on them.

Next are the power cords. A friend of mine said her kids always liked them, too. Actually, my daughter’s very favorite power cord is the one on my laptop. I think that’s because it has a transformer box with a little green light on it. I wouldn’t think it would have a particular flavor, but that doesn’t stop the baby from tasting it every chance she gets. Her second favorite is the controller cord on my electric blanket. I really do try to keep things out of reach, but some things just need to stay plugged in.

Something I DO remember to keep put away are plastic bags. But sometimes when I’m cooking dinner, I have the waste basket out. Inevitably, the baby gravitates towards yet another deadly toy. She must just like the way it sounds. Or the way the garbage smells when the whole trash can tips over. Once I forgot to put up the waste basket in my office when she was with me. Aside from the bag lining it, there’s only paper in the can. But my baby likes the taste of paper, apparently. And it sticks really well to the roof of her mouth. So well, in fact, that I didn’t find it until the next morning.

Finally, I saved the best for last. If you really want to keep my daughter happy and quiet for a good half hour, give her a shoe. When we realized how much she adored footwear, my husband kind of rolled his eyes and said something about her being such a girl. But time proved that she doesn’t really want to wear shoes, she just wants to chew them. Now he rolls his eyes and says something about her being a puppy. OK, so maybe shoes aren’t deadly toys, but they are really gross. Come to think of it, the shoelaces could strangle her. And there could be some kind of nasty infectious substance on the soles. So, I guess she’s 4 for 4 on the suicidal playthings. We’re thinking (seriously) about buying her a pair of clean shoes as a toy for Christmas. I could pull out the laces and if they never go outside, they’ll stay as clean as any “real” toy.

Here are some tips for successfully baby-proofing your home.

So, am I the only one with a baby that has a death wish? What do your kids play with that really shouldn’t be a toy?

As you begin to enter the home stretch of your pregnancy, you?ll want to start thinking about packing a bag for the hospital. Not only do you need to pack for yourself, but your new baby and your birthing coach(es) will need a few items as well.

For You

When I packed my bag the first time around, I went a step beyond simply preparing for labor. In fact, there was little I didn?t bring along. Not only did I have an iPod docking station, but the iPod was loaded with playlists for delivery, birth, infant and many other events. Not only did we barely listen to it, but it was one more thing to have to haul out of the hospital and home upon discharge.

When packing for yourself, think about what you really need ? do you need a nightgown? The hospital will have you in a gown for the duration of your stay, and most likely you?ll need to change it a few times over that period. Do you want to have to bring several nightgowns that may end up stained?

My necessities list includes:

• A camera
• Pad of paper and pen
• Phone list of friends/relatives to notify
• Shampoo and other toiletries
• Change of clothes for the ride home (note: these clothes are maternity clothes; most women continue to wear maternity clothes for at least a month after delivering)
• Magazines
• Lip balm
• Makeup

For Partners/Coaches

Your partner and/or birthing coach will probably be there a while; bring along a magazine or two, as well as bottled water and snacks.

For Baby

Newborn babies need very little, and much of it will be provided by the hospital, including receiving blankets and diapers. However, there are some items to make sure you have, and a few that you will be required to have. My list includes:

• Car seat
• Blanket to put over the car seat in case it?s cold outside
• Outfit for coming home
• Pacifiers

Don’t wait until it’s too late for those last minute things to do. Making a checklist and completing early will give you much needed peace of mind.

What are your hospital essentials?

Today is Thanksgiving in the United States, and for many people, this means traveling long distances to be with family and/or friends. It is possible to travel with children and to still remain sane enough to participate in holiday festivities; it just requires a little more effort.

When I became a parent, I quickly gave up driving through the night. Before kids, I could leave at midnight and drive through the night to avoid the traffic. After a few hours of sleep, I could expect to function reasonably well enough to participate in the festivities. After kids, I discovered that driving through the night just didn’t work for me anymore. When I was ready to go to bed in the morning after driving all night, the kids were ready to get up! Not only that, but a few hours of sleep didn’t give me the energy or the attitude I needed to run after lively children.

Now, if we need to make a long trip, we drive during the day and we allow plenty of time to get to the destination. I usually add 2-3 hours onto our driving time estimation. This allows us time for rest stops, eating, and bathroom breaks.

I’ve found that it’s helpful to view the drive as part of the adventure, not just something to get through. Towards that goal, we try to stop at several roadside attractions along the way just to do something different. The children really look forward to these stops! When I was nursing my son, it also allowed me time to feed him in the car while everyone was out.

It’s also helpful to pack fun activities for the children to do during the car ride. If your children are older, you might consider buying some small trinkets at the Dollar Store to reward them after so many miles (or hours) of good behavior. There are travel games that you can buy at the store too which can help. If your budget won’t allow that expenditure, you can play license plate bingo or “I Spy” during the journey for free!

Another good idea is to stop by the local library and check out the great selection of music and books on tape for children. My children love to listen to stories when we drive and it helps to keep them amused!

Remember-and remind yourself of this during the journey-getting there IS half the fun!