In my previous post, I discussed some helpful tips on registering for baby products. But what exactly do you include in your registry?

I found registering for baby even more overwhelming than compiling a wedding registry. I?d been running a household for five years before getting married; I knew what kitchen appliances and tools had worn out and what gadgets we?d been eyeing for some time. I knew I needed new sheets, towels, pots and pans and a vacuum cleaner.

But, registering for our first baby was a different experience. We needed virtually everything to care for an infant, and weren?t sure where to start. (Oh, and a new vacuum cleaner, too!) With such a long list, it was hard to keep track of what we had already selected, and what we still needed to add to the registry.

Compiling a check list before we hit the stores and the Web helped. I?ve broken it down into categories for easy reference. Your list may be different depending on what you already have from previous children, or what you?ve found at garage sales, through friends, or even on Craig?s List or Freecycle. Some of these items are optional based on your lifestyle.

Another thing I found helpful was going with an experienced friend to register for many of the more confusing items. We take our expedition tomorrow, and I will report on how it went and what I learned.

Big-Ticket Items

• Bassinet/ Crib
• Crib Mattress
• Changing Table
• Infant car seat/carrier/stroller travel system
• Additional car seat base for second car
• Baby/toddler car seat

Miscellaneous

• Travel playpen
• Baby monitor
• Baby or pet gates
• Diaper bag
• Lightweight umbrella stroller
• Baby carrier/sling
• Child-proofing products (Read this article for an expanded checklist.)
• Glider or rocking chair
• Baby book

* Many of these items overlap. For instance, you can opt for a regular stroller, and then get a convertible car seat that functions as an infant car seat and converts to a toddler car seat when the baby reaches 20 pounds. Or, your travel system may include the infant car seat/carrier, so you?ll want to buy another car seat, which converts to a booster seat later on. Of course, this purchase can wait, but you may as well register for it! You can also find a travel playpen that doubles as a bassinet and changing table.

Toys

• The possibilities are endless, but here?s a list to get you started.
• Baby swing
• Infant gym/playmate (for tummy time)
• Stationary exerciser
• Crib mobile
• Soft Blocks
• Mirror
• Stacking cups
• Rattles and noisemakers
• Phthalate-free teethers

Grooming & Hygiene

• Potty seat
• Step stool (for toddler)
• Infant bath
• Bath toys
• Baby shampoo
• Wash cloths
• Diapers
• Diaper pail
• Changing table pad
• Baby wipes
• Soft-bristled hair brush

Clothing

• Booties – 2 pair
• Knitted hat or sun hat (for winter or summer) ? 2
• Sleep sacks, pajamas w/ feet or nightgowns ? (total 7)
• Onesies or t-shirts ? 6 ? 10
• Socks ? 10 pair
• Sweaters (for winter and fall)? 2 or more
• Snowsuit (for winter)
• Outfit for hospital photos (may want to purchase in 0 ? 3 mos. and 3 ? 6 mos. sizes) Seasonally-appropriate outfit to go home from hospital

Linens

• Receiving blankets
• Crib sheets
• Bassinet sheets

For meal-time

• High chair
• Breast pump (This can be rented).
• Bottles
• Nipples
• Nursing Supplies
• Pacifier
• Baby spoons & bowl
• Bibs
• Spit-up cloths

For Mom

• Nightgown for hospital (opens in front for breastfeeding)
• New slippers
• Boppy pillow (if you haven?t purchased one during pregnancy, you may want one for breastfeeding)

Readers, have I forgotten anything?

The baby shower is so much more than a gift giving session?it?s an event to mark the passage of a couple into parenthood, and to celebrate the birth of a child. Baby showers are important events requiring special care to plan in the best of circumstances. When the mother-to-be lives out of state and is on bedrest, this can complicate the plan, but it need not be a show stopper.

When I got remarried, I moved 800 miles away from my family, who mostly reside within a 50 mile radius of each other. Family friends live about 1 ? hours away in another state, but for the most part, everyone is centrally located.

When we announced the great news that we were expecting, my sisters began planning me a shower as it had been 9 years since the birth of my last child! It was assumed that I would make the 450 mile trip north to attend my baby shower where everyone lived, as it was the most logical plan. Apparently, life doesn?t follow logic.

I was put on modified bedrest during the last few months of my pregnancy. With my husband away with the Army for training, and four other children to care for, life was challenging enough. When I mentioned the baby shower plans to my doctor, he nixed them. That was too far of a drive to do alone and even if I could have someone help me out by driving, it wasn?t advisable.

My sisters were disappointed, but not deterred, and began planning the ?new? baby shower?without my knowledge. Recently, I saw an article about a family who gathered together and actually had a virtual shower for a woman in their family who had moved far away because of her husband?s military service. Both the woman and her family had webcams and they could watch her open up her gifts. That is an awesome idea, but sadly, my family is not technologically equipped.

Instead, most mailed the gifts to my home at my sisters? request. Others, who could make the trip, drove the gifts to a place where friend?s of my husband lived. He would be traveling that way after his military training, and could pick up the gifts before heading back to our house a few days before our child was due to arrive.

On my end, all I knew was that the baby shower had been canceled. I was deeply saddened and disappointed, but I tried to concentrate on the positive things like the fact that my child was healthy, that my pregnancy would soon be over, and that my family cared enough to suggest a shower.

On the day my husband was to arrive home, my mother-in-law stopped by to clean the house for me. I have to admit, my husband doesn?t care if the house is clean or not, so this was a shocker. Even more shocking was the fact that she arrived with a large amount of food from a local caterer. About an hour or so later, my husband arrived home with a car load of gifts and a few minutes after that, the neighbors arrived with gifts in tow.

We had a great time opening gifts and calling the different relatives on the phone to share the excitement with them?the low-tech version of the webcam experience. Although it wasn?t quite what it could have been had all of my loved ones been present with me while I was opening the gifts, it certainly was a very good option given the circumstances.

Baby showers are about sharing the joy that a new baby brings to a family and a community, and a way for others to help the new parents prepare for the new arrival. So why is it that society’s etiquette seems to say that showers for a second baby are not acceptable?

We’re expecting baby #2. As such, my husband and I are debating and deliberating a number of things: baby names, how to help our first born adjust to not being the only baby any more, and whether it’s proper etiquette to have a baby shower when it’s not the first baby.

I think it depends on what your goal is for the shower. We want to have a second baby shower to share the joy and celebrate with our friends and family, whom we don’t get to see as often as we would like. Our idea of the shower would be a brunch or a casual barbecue, taking place on a sunny summer afternoon in our backyard or someone else’s, where we can sit back and just enjoy spending time with each other.

Instead of gifts, which we don’t really need, we might ask for a donation toward the second child’s college fund. However, some people just can’t imagine a shower without gifts. For them, we might suggest the following non-traditional shower gift ideas - in fact, they could even make unique shower theme ideas.

• Books. We can never get enough books. Guests can bring a copy of their favorite children’s book – whether from their own childhood or what they read to their own children - to give to the new baby.
• Freezer stock. Everyone brings a frozen casserole or other dish that we can stick in the freezer until the baby arrives, so that we can enjoy a hot, home-cooked meal every now and again.
• Savings bonds. An investment toward baby’s future.
• Memberships. A membership to the zoo, the city parks department for free admission, or the local Y can be a great help to new parents.

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I vaguely remember my baby shower ? I was a bloated exhausted seven months pregnant and the thought of a room full of my husbands crazy French relatives, and my own family made me long for the couch, a Snickers, and some maternity sweatpants….

But I suffered through it. I had spent hours pouring over baby stuff from Target and made a fantastic (if I don’t say so myself) registry of top notch baby chairs, swings, and polka dot swaddlers. I will be honest ? I’m an opinionated young mom who believes in ?stupid stuff? girls don’t need to wear pink in order to diffuse future gender issues….My list was a colorful array of lemony yellows, and deep forest greens. At my baby shower the only item I got that I requested was a first aid kit. Sitting in the center of a restaurant surrounded by pink frilly nightgowns I wanted to sob. So, from a post-pregnant-hormonal-current mom to the go-er of a baby shower….here are the top ten items you can get someone who’s full of baby:

1. Diapers and wipes. I know I know you were probably thinking along the lines of an elaborate ?going home form hospital? gown but lets face it: all babies do is poop and pee. Diapers are expensive and a new mom can’t get enough…the thought of a nursery chock full of supplies is comforting for a new mom who’s going to want to spend what little free time she has napping, not cruising the baby isle of Shop rite.
2. Get a diaper genie, for said diapers and wipes. If you wanna be really cute get a 100 pack of Pampers for newborns, and the genie. It’s a god-send!A nice safe, powder fresh place to store dirty diapers.
3. Gift cards (I know I know, I need to get the boring stuff out of the way) Once said diapers run out and the mom to be (who may or may not be nursing or pumping or formula feeding) will need baby stuff. Baby stuff can get expensive and there’s nothing more satisfying than realizing you have a $50 gift card to Babies R Us so you won’t need to shell out your own money.
4. Onesies. Remember when I mentioned poop and pee? Well, I forget drool, vomit, and boogers. New moms sometimes swoon at the idea of dresses, and little sailor outfits for their newborns but the truth is we are often too exhausted to deal with anything less than a piece of cotton that has three buttons. And when you end up changing said newborn five or five hundred times per day it’s nice to have an endless supply of onesies around.
5. A month’s worth of pick up laundry service. This will be the best gift ever, I can promise you.
6. If you’re the DIY type why don’t you make a coupon book, similar to the kind you might have made your parents when you were too little to have a real job, and real money to buy them gifts? Coupons that say ?4 hrs babysitting while you sleep in? or ?two meals cooked by yours truly…?
7. Bibs. Hundreds and millions of bibs…pre-baby I had a nice stack of about thirty in my linen closet and now I’m lucky if I can find one before I force feed my daughter rice cereal. There is is parallel universe where all the bibs end up, floating around.
8. A breast pump. I know this tends to cater to the boob-mom but even the worst kind of boob-mom sometimes needs a break. Maybe she wants to go out for dinner, maybe she wants to sleep through the night? She’ll need to pump, and pumping is expensive. Chip in, or rent the woman a breast pump! You can also scour Ebay and Craigslist for them.
9. Subscriptions to mom-magazines. You’d never guess, but there are lots of fun friendly magazines that make the (sometimes) dull monotonous days of mommy-hood go buy. My two personal favorites? Cookie and Wondertime. Steer clear of Baby Couture unless your mom-to-be is materialistic and the type to chuckle at six year old girls looking like mini Kate Moses.
10. The baby Bjorn baby chair. It’s pricey, but there’s a reason…it’s a miracle worker. It’s pretty basic (red or black gingham I believe) and has wooden toys once baby becomes interested and develops that fun thing called hand eye coordination. The little one can relax, or once he’s ready sit propped up to view the world. While being a mini voyeur he can twirl the wooden bears or suck on them, while mom does what she needs to do.

I hope I helped at least one person. One person with a sense of humor and the understanding that the basics in baby-buying are important

Planning the Perfect Baby Shower
One of the most exciting events an expecting mother looks forward to is celebrating her baby shower.

Deciding to Throw a Baby Shower
Baby showers are often thrown by a friend or family member. Formal tradition dictates that someone other than a family member throws the baby shower, but this certainly does not have to be the case and many modern women go against the grain and welcome any offers from family willing to throw a party on their and baby’s behalf.

Preparing Ahead of Time: The First Critical Steps
Planning and throwing a shower can be a cumbersome task if you go into in unprepared. It certainly does not have to be however, if you keep a few things in mind.

One of the most important considerations is planning where and when the baby shower will take place. The majority of baby showers are held before mom gives birth, but this is not always the case and certainly does not have to be. Some mothers are superstitious and prefer to have the baby shower after birth, to ensure the happy and healthy delivery of their newborn. Be sure if you are planning the happy event to check in with mom to be to ensure you plan it at a time that is comfortable for her.

Most showers are held in someone’s home other than that of the new mom. Typically the person throwing the baby shower hosts the party at their house or at an alternate location such as a park or reception hall.

Invitation List
The next step in planning a shower is figuring out who to invite. The guest list should be the responsibility of the guest of honor. Letting mom develop the invitation list will ensure that no one gets left out.

Most parties held are women-only parties, though this trend is rapidly changing. As fathers continue to become more involved in the planning for new babies, many couples are starting to hold co-ed parties that invite couples. Be sure to check in again with the guest of honor to ensure that the theme of the party matches her preferences.

Themes and Thrills
Deciding on a theme isn’t necessary, but can add fun and excitement to the party. The theme of the party for an expectant parent who is having a boy baby might be something as simple as a color, such as “green”. Guests might be encouraged to bring gifts that correspond with the nursery room theme as well. Many parents for example, design baby’s room with a certain theme in mind such as ducks. Guests might consider brining items that match this idea. Even the cake and decorations can be designed to incorporate a selected topic or idea.

No baby shower would be complete without incorporating a few fun games. Deciding on games doesn’t require a degree in rocket science. One popular and traditional game involves having everyone get together in a circle and write down one piece of advice for the mom to be. Another one might have everyone right down one prediction for the new baby’s future. These cards can be collected at the end of the party and stored in baby’s memory book for review at a later date, providing a wonderful memento for mommy to be and baby.

Though it is not required, some hosts provide gag gifts for anyone participating in a game. This can be a fun way to allow mom and guests enjoy the gift giving bonanza.

One last tip to consider prior to throwing the party is finding out where an expectant mom is registered. Including this information on the invitation or having it available to give out to guests will truly help mom receive special gifts that will match her preferences for baby’s first year. One of the reasons for throwing a shower is to help new parents collect much needed items for baby’s first year.

About The Author
Adriana Copaceanu provides people with creative gift ideas that don’t blow the bank. Gift Baskets for Baby to Birthday and Beyond, are just some gift ideas you’ll find at her site: www.abcgiftsandbaskets.com Want regular reminders on gift-giving? Sign up for her free monthly newsletter at www.abcgiftsandbaskets.com/gift-news-signup.htm.