When I had my daughter last October, it was the first time I’d been around a baby in nearly two decades.

While I did a lot of research on pregnancy and childbirth my nine months of pregnancy, for some reason I was so caught up in the adventure of “having” a baby that I didn’t think about what it would be like to raise a baby. Just as I turned to pregnancy books before my little one was born, I turned to parenting books in the first few weeks after her birth.

Here is a short list of the titles I would recommend, buy for close friends and keep on my bookshelf for years to come.

1. What to Expect the First Year by Heidi Murkoff – Just like What to Expect When You’re Expecting, this conversational tome is comprehensive and well-organized. While the authors recommend and rely on pediatrician’s advice more often than my personal philosophies would prefer, the book literally covers every topic a new parent could need. I turn to the book each month to see how my daughter is doing regarding milestones, and frequently throughout the month for parenting tips and tricks. I plan to build the entire library of “What to Expect” titles in the coming years.
2. No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley– This practical book outlines a gentle, effective way to start your newborn on the path of sleeping through the night. Didn’t start early? The book also offers techniques to help infants over four months old to begin falling asleep on their own and sleeping through the night. Pantley is not against co-sleeping, but does offer tips for parents who want to break that cycle of having the baby in bed with them. The book also addresses the psychological factors behind night-time feedings, asking mothers to decide if they are ready, emotionally, for their baby to sleep through the night or if they’re still craving that late-night, quiet contact.

 

3. How to Raise a Healthy Child in Spite of your Doctor by Robert Mendelsohn – For those looking for an alternative medicine/natural health approach to child-rearing, this book provides practical advice and solutions. Mendelsohn asserts that there’s rarely a reason to involve your pediatrician and gives you the knowledge to diagnose and treat many common ailments. I’ll be referring to this book in many instances before I call my baby’s doctor.

 

4. Anything by Dr. Sears – The “Dr. Spock” of our generation, Dr. Sear’s volumes are comprehensive, informative and authoritative. He advocates attachment parenting, but also teaches balance in the family and a common sense approach to parenting. As the father of eight children, including noted author and pediatrician Dr. Robert Sears, his advice can be trusted.

 

5. The Nursery Collections – or any other comprehensive volume of children’s nursery rhymes and short stories. I know the first time I was faced with singing a classic like “The Wheels on the Bus” to my daughter, I completely blanked on the words. While my sister assured me the baby doesn’t care if I’m singing the right lyrics or even in tune, it bothered me! A collection of rhymes and songs will save your sanity and give you a constant arsenal of baby entertainment.

 

6. Dr. Seuss Books – For a limited time you can receive TWO FREE Dr Seuss books and a FREE TOTE BAG from Babies Online. You can find more baby freebies right here at Babies Online including free baby & parenting magazine offers and more!

Readers, what are your favorite parenting titles?

Before I had my daughter, I never imagined I’d allow her to nurse as much as she wanted—sometimes using me as a pacifier. I was staunchly against co-sleeping, and couldn’t imagine holding her nearly every waking hour.

I’ll be honest; my perception of “attachment parenting” was that it’s a new age-y concept designed for SAHMs who would raise clingy, co-dependent children. I couldn’t have been more wrong on every level.

As I read more about attachment parenting, I learned that attachment parenting actually helps to raise more trusting, confident children who are secure in the fact that their needs will be met.

I also realized that attachment parenting is not as challenging as it may sound. After all, who wouldn’t want to keep this bundle of joy as close as possible?

I like Dr. Sears’ views on the matter. On his Web site, he states: “[AP is] actually the style that many parents use instinctively.” That is exactly what I discovered in the first few weeks of motherhood, too.

My daughter isn’t comfortable in a carrier, probably because I don’t feel secure holding her in it, so we’re not completely “attached.” But I often work with her sitting on my lap, carry her around during chores, and do anything requiring two hands while she naps. Even when she’s not in my arms, if she’s awake, I’m doing something with her: Reading, playing, or feeding her. As she grows I’m sure we’ll transition away from this arrangement or become comfortable with the carrier… obviously, I can’t carry her in my arms forever. But I’m fortunate to be able to schedule my day to spend as much time with her as possible.

And co-sleeping? After taking all the necessary safety precautions, it turns out co-sleeping in the early hours of the morning when the baby wakes up and needs to eat, is just easier. She starts the night in her bassinet, but joins us after her four o’clock feeding, when we both fall asleep. Another confession? I rather like having her cuddled up next to me.

Feeding on cue became easy once I learned her hunger signals, and it just so happens she still has a hearty appetite that needs food about every hour-and-a-half. This can be harrowing, but I get through it by reminding myself that she won’t be nursing forever, and when I start her on cereal in a short six weeks, her belly will stay full longer.

I’ve also discovered that feeding her while I eat (especially in restaurants) is a great way to keep her quiet and happy through mealtimes. It’s even kept us from having to leave restaurants mid-meal, as I will never (I don’t believe in absolutes, but there’s no room for compromise with this one) be an inconvenience to other customers by permitting a crying baby to disrupt the entire room.

I’ve often laughed that our approach to parenting would upset the “diehard” AP practitioners as well as those who believe in strict scheduling. When I’ve mentioned my refusal to let the baby “cry it out,” I’ve heard comments like, “Oh, you’re not one of those ‘attachment parent types’ are you?” And AP practitioners probably feel I’m not close enough because I sometimes supplement with formula and don’t use a sling-style carrier or keep the baby with me during her daytime naps.

But I try to avoid extremes and excesses in every area of my life… why should parenting be any different? Maybe I’ll write a book and start my own parenting philosophy. I’ll call it “Do what works for you and your baby.”