You Are More Than a Number
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I saw an article recently about a trend for women to diet during pregnancy. According to the article, women are trying to emulate the numerous slim, yet pregnant celebrities by dieting excessively during pregnancy. I have not known women who actually do this, but I admit, I have seen more than my share of women who diet excessively after the baby is born in order to resize to their svelte pre-pregnancy shape. I also know women who just lose that pregnancy weight easily.
We all know at least one woman who gained like 11 pounds and ate any and everything while she was expecting and actually left the hospital with her baby weighing less than she did before her pregnancy. Well, at least I do.
I also have several friends who were back in their pre-pregnancy jeans by the time they went back to work 6 weeks later.
My body doesn’t work that way. I’ve carried 5 babies to term and for each of them, it’s taken me at least 10 months to regain my pre-pregnancy figure. Yes, I watch my calories and yes, I exercised. It seemed that no matter what I did, the baby weight didn’t budge until after I weaned my children.
I suppose this was one of those actually good evolutionary things that was pre-programmed into women of my genetic history—you know, for the good of the survival of our species during the early, early years of history. I assume this is so because all of the women in my family who nursed their babies shared the same struggle.
However, only in the last 40 years or so has this created a dilemma for anyone. For example, in my grandmother’s generation, a woman with curves and a little extra fat was considered desirable. People were just coming out of the Depression, and being skinny meant that you couldn’t afford to eat. How times have changed!
With my son, I have noticed a sort of unhealthy sense of competition between women to race to see who can lose her pregnancy weight the quickest. Just who can zip up those jeans first? I actually got an email from an acquaintance who belonged to our homeschool group announcing that she had lost precisely 18 pounds in the 3 weeks since she birthed her son. She had only 10 more pounds to go until she was her pre-pregnancy size. She detailed her plans to drop those last 10 pounds too.
I was stunned and saddened. Where was the “it’s been 3 weeks since little Elmo came home and he’s almost sleeping through the night!” or “Little Elmo has his Daddy’s eyes most definitely!”
I have a different perspective though. I have difficult pregnancies and after numerous miscarriages and a stillborn child, the weight games mean nothing to me. If given the choice between a healthy child and several baby pounds that I couldn’t shed, I’d choose the child. Yes, with my first child I obsessed over my weight and feared that I wouldn’t lose my pregnancy pounds. But it’s been 15 years since then, and I am approaching the age of 40. I have to say I am heavier than when I birthed my first child, but I am also healthier.
I have learned to make peace with my body and to accept the fact that it will do what it is designed to do, irregardless of the “acceptable” images that the media and our culture toss out. It has taken me almost 40 years to get to the point where I am able to accept my body and marvel at the miracle of it all.
Perhaps you are reading this article now and you have concerns just like I did during my first pregnancy. I’d encourage you to enjoy your pregnancy and to be objective about your weight, not obsessive. I’d encourage you to realize that just because Suzy Starlette is thin and svelte during and after her pregnancy doesn’t mean it will be that way for you. It may take sometime for your body to lose all that weight, or you may not lose those last 5 pounds. I’d encourage you to look at your overall health and not at the number on the scale or your pant size for validation.
Remember, you are more than your size or your weight!
Melissa H says...
Amen sister! I for one look at what a remarkable job my body has just done and the amazing gift it has just given me and all I feel is gratitude. Yes I would love to be slim again maybe a little less hip and a lot less boob…. but I wouldn’t trade it for the little one that I thank God for every day. I also have lost several and the one I have is well worth every extra inch! ( because though I have lost the weight… I don’t really recognize my new bod yet LOL)
moni918 says...
I agree! I just noticed looking at the baby/pregnancy mags-how they only show models who are skinny or have that perfect little tummy w/out stretchmarks! I don’t know anyone who has looked that way during pregnancy-how is that different from the fashion magazines that show the skinny models with the clothes no one can afford to wear because of size and prize anyway. I’m all for eating healthy and exercising but there are too many factors affecting even those decisions-natural healthy foods are soo expensive. We all just do the best we can-let’s keep our feet on the ground and pass this on to our daughters and other young women we influence (I’m a teacher, I know I influence at least 20 kids each year)-lets educate them to be proud of being real women and to learn to love what GOD gave them.