What NOT To Say To A Pregnant Woman
I am only slightly showing with my child, but I am already wearing maternity clothing. My teen asked me why this was the other day. Because I feel the need to make it obvious to the world that I am slightly larger than usual because I am pregnant, not because I am almost 40 and gaining weight. That is why. My teen said she agreed. Rather for people to know you are pregnant than think that you are gaining weight.
My husband asks me why I even care. I don’t know, but I do care. I also care about the stupid remarks I know will inevitably come during this pregnancy. Here are some of my “favorites”:
Are you having twins?- Seriously. Most pregnant women already feel extremely large. Even if they are large, they don’t need a stranger to validate that fact.
Your due date is in a few days, right? – No. No it isn’t.
Can I touch your stomach? – No. I am pregnant, but I am not public property.
You know that if your butt gets big like yours is getting, they say it’s a girl? – Really? WHAT are you doing looking at my butt like that.
Drum roll please…..
Are you related to that Michelle Duggar chick? – OK. I have 4 children from my first marriage. I have a son with my current hubby and I am pregnant again. Yes, our family is large. There is a big difference between 6 kids and 17(or is it 18?). And, please spare me the “clever” comments.
Do you have any comments to add to this list? What are some things that you think should NEVER be said to a pregnant woman?
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Jessica says...
Definitely never insist on giving a pregnant woman details of complications that you think she may or may not have…unless she asks. Ditto with reporting information from news articles about new environmental things to worry about!
Lucy says...
I’ve got a good one! My mother-in-law and her best friend once remarked how a woman who is close to her due date (has “dropped”) looks and walks like a cow about to give birth. Having both grown up on farms, they then proceeded to elaborate, including graphic details of the methods their fathers used to use in birthing calves. This was within a couple of weeks of my due date with my first child.
Heidi says...
I’m done with being asked how I’m feeling. It’s nice that people are concerned but seriously; I’m 14 weeks along and I had no morning sickness to begin with.
Melissa H says...
You have pretty much hit them all…. but I am pregnant with my fourth and I am really tired of the follow up question of having twins ” Are you SURE you’re not having twins?” or the follow up to answering that no you aren’t due to go any day of ” You’re due WHEN?” I know that I am huge… and only 19 weeks in just imagine what I will look like at 39… but GOD I am tired of other people helping me to feel like a walrus!!!!!!!!! Still I am happier with these kinds of comments than the idea of getting when are you due when I am not pregnant… not happened to me but I know people who it has happened to. That is a rough one!
VaMomma says...
Some encouragement for you. When I was pregnant with my 4th….I just kinda got large quick and then grew into myself. Does that make sense?
I am sure you’ll look stellar at 39 weeks! Best wishes to you.
Anne says...
“Your ankles look swollen!” – thanks, I already knew that! Don’t need a reminder! “Do you need a massage? Does your back hurt?” – thanks but, that’s what hubby/bf/significant other is for. besides, I don’t like random people touching me! “You must be tired, here, take my seat!” – sweet but, I am independent, so no, I’m good. Besides, laying around all day anyway is enough rest for me!
How about when people just walk up to you, and try to touch your belly? I hate that!
Or what about, if you aren’t even pregnant, and people ask if you are?
It is nice for people to be concerned but, at the same time, it’s annoying. Although, if it’s something like, letting me on the elevator first, or making a little room, that’s nice.