The War Between Biology and Reality
I saw an article yesterday about the clash between our modern culture and our biology. Basically, the author had interviewed a lot of women trying to conceive later in life and came to the shocking conclusion which many of us ‘older‘ women have already discovered: reproducing when you are nearing 40 is not as easy as reproducing in your 20’s.
Sure, we all know that our biological clocks wind down as we age–or so we‘ve been told. When I talk with my friends who are attempting to have a child later in life, they all are aware of the facts. Yet, without a doubt, almost all of them still cling to the fact that somehow they’ll be different. The studies MIGHT say whatever they might say, but nevertheless, the great majority of women want to believe that somehow, they are immune to the realities of that reproductive time clock.
I call this ‘The Star Trek Effect’and I’ve seen examples of this effect in other areas of my life. For example, my two oldest children have a degenerative eye disease called retinitis pigmentosa and are slowly going blind. I can’t tell you the number of people I’ve met or talked with that are shocked, absolutely and utterly shocked, that ‘they’haven’t found a cure for this type of blindness yet. Ah, ‘The Star Trek Effect’in action! Humanity somehow believes that there is a cure for everything, and that science one day will give us all the answers we need if we only do enough exploration and are open to learning. Perhaps in the distant future this will be so, but for now, science is woefully lacking in some areas.
Sometimes ‘they’can’t cure the disease. Sometimes, having a baby isn’t as simple as one would think it should be. Sometimes, ‘they’can’t fix it.
Right now, I personally know of three women who are waging war with their biological clocks. Two of those women have invested numerous hours and dollars in their war. One woman is just beginning her battle. All of them, despite the harsh reality of their situation, believe that somehow, they will be the one to beat the clock. They will be having that healthy, beautiful child they want-and soon too. They are positive that medical science will have that answer for them too, if they need it. All they have to do is invest a little more time and money to the cause.
As we approach Mother’s Day, my heart breaks for these women, and all the other women who struggle with fertility issues, no matter what their circumstances.