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Baby Shower Complications

The baby shower is so much more than a gift giving session?it?s an event to mark the passage of a couple into parenthood, and to celebrate the birth of a child. Baby showers are important events requiring special care to plan in the best of circumstances. When the mother-to-be lives out of state and is on bedrest, this can complicate the plan, but it need not be a show stopper.

When I got remarried, I moved 800 miles away from my family, who mostly reside within a 50 mile radius of each other. Family friends live about 1 ? hours away in another state, but for the most part, everyone is centrally located.

When we announced the great news that we were expecting, my sisters began planning me a shower as it had been 9 years since the birth of my last child! It was assumed that I would make the 450 mile trip north to attend my baby shower where everyone lived, as it was the most logical plan. Apparently, life doesn?t follow logic.

I was put on modified bedrest during the last few months of my pregnancy. With my husband away with the Army for training, and four other children to care for, life was challenging enough. When I mentioned the baby shower plans to my doctor, he nixed them. That was too far of a drive to do alone and even if I could have someone help me out by driving, it wasn?t advisable.

My sisters were disappointed, but not deterred, and began planning the ?new? baby shower?without my knowledge. Recently, I saw an article about a family who gathered together and actually had a virtual shower for a woman in their family who had moved far away because of her husband?s military service. Both the woman and her family had webcams and they could watch her open up her gifts. That is an awesome idea, but sadly, my family is not technologically equipped.

Instead, most mailed the gifts to my home at my sisters? request. Others, who could make the trip, drove the gifts to a place where friend?s of my husband lived. He would be traveling that way after his military training, and could pick up the gifts before heading back to our house a few days before our child was due to arrive.

On my end, all I knew was that the baby shower had been canceled. I was deeply saddened and disappointed, but I tried to concentrate on the positive things like the fact that my child was healthy, that my pregnancy would soon be over, and that my family cared enough to suggest a shower.

On the day my husband was to arrive home, my mother-in-law stopped by to clean the house for me. I have to admit, my husband doesn?t care if the house is clean or not, so this was a shocker. Even more shocking was the fact that she arrived with a large amount of food from a local caterer. About an hour or so later, my husband arrived home with a car load of gifts and a few minutes after that, the neighbors arrived with gifts in tow.

We had a great time opening gifts and calling the different relatives on the phone to share the excitement with them?the low-tech version of the webcam experience. Although it wasn?t quite what it could have been had all of my loved ones been present with me while I was opening the gifts, it certainly was a very good option given the circumstances.


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