In one week, my wife and I will get up very early, leave our daughter with my in-laws, and drive to the hospital. A few hours after we leave I will be a father of two.
I have spent a lot of time these last few months thinking about how I will handle being a father to two children. I spend a lot of time struggling with so-called “daddy guilt” (or, in its more politically correct, gender-inclusive form, “working parent guilt”) as it is, and soon I will have two children that I’m trying to spend time with.
Initially, I don’t expect it to be as difficult, aside from my own “baby crazy” nature. My daughter will need my 100% undivided attention when I get home after she has spent the day “sharing” my wife with the baby, so she and I will likely become after-work playmates even more than we are now. My time with my son will come after she goes to bed since he’ll be up and down all evening (if he’s anything like his sister).
However, when they are both a little older, and both awake and aware when I get home, then things will be difficult. The “divide and conquer” strategy will work for a bit, but when one of us is cooking, the other will be outnumbered. And then there’s the fact that I’ll feel badly for not spending time with one of them while I’m with the other one.
To those of you with more than one child, how did you deal with the transition? Did you find you spent more time with your kids than before, or did you just divide the time you used to spend with one into two?
You can read more SciFi Dad at Tales From The Dad Side.