The Circle of Life
I remember finding out on Christmas Day that we were expecting our newest arrival. I remember calculating due dates and realizing that this child was due to arrive the day after my grandmother’s birthday in August.
We just got word that my grandmother is dying. She has been ill for a while, but things have taken a dramatic turn for the worse this week. Tomorrow, our family will make the 800 mile drive north to say goodbye to her.
I last saw my grandmother almost two years ago, when my son was only a few months old. My grandmother was so proud of her great-grandchildren! She sat and read them stories and sang to them and we took videos and pictures to document the whole visit. My sister had also arrived from out of town with her children and all of the cousins had a wonderful time together.
My grandmother does not yet know that we are expecting a child. I knew that she’d worry about me, and about the baby as I am of “advanced maternal age“. I thought it best to not worry her. Will I tell her about her new great-grandchild? Probably not. This weekend is not about that.
I know this weekend will be hard, but I’ll concentrate on the good times and think of those things. Death, sadly, is part of life. I can’t change that. But I can choose to focus on the positives instead of dwelling on my sadness.