Parenting Styles
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I remember when I was a new mom and I thought I knew it all. I’d read every bit of expert information regarding the raising of my baby as I could get my hands on, and by all accounts my daughter was thriving and brilliant and wonderful. I must have been doing something right, so whenever I saw another mom do something contrary to my parenting style I stifled my tsk-tsk reflex and silently thought about how lucky my daughter was to have a mom who did what the experts said to do.
It was around the time my daughter hit three years old that I noticed something that was quite intriguing: All the kids she socialized with were all starting to pretty much even out with their abilities. While it’s true that some kids could speak a little better than others and some kids had more physical abilities than others, the differences were getting harder and harder to see unless you really looked for them.
This is also around the time that it dawned on me that the different parenting styles are just that: different. I don’t know if my attachment parenting was any better than the disciplinarian tactics that my friend used because both our daughters are smart, happy preschoolers. Imagine that…my daughter slept next to me for her first few months while my friend’s daughter slept in a crib from her first night home from the hospital, yet they’re both thriving. Go figure.
I’m not saying that you can treat your baby any way you please and she’ll wind up happy and healthy, but I think that there is a lot to be said for loving your babies and giving them consistency regardless of which “expert” you choose to follow.
Now if only I could have found an expert who said that new moms need a housekeeping service and a husband who gives foot massages every night,
Jessica says...
I don’t care how old your kids are - when you need a boost - the best way to make yourself feel like the mom that knows it all is to brag about your perfect angels to a friend that doesn’t have any kids. They’re less judgmental of your parenting style when you gush about all that is right with your world.
Lissa says...
Thank you for writing this. Honestly this is one reason why I avoid going to parent forums cause there is just too much competition sometimes. I accept the fact that my baby will not walk as early as 11 months or talk as early as 12 months. As long as he’s healthy and happy I’m okay with that. I just keep reminding myself about the numerous famous people who had to overcome disabilities during their childhood and they turned out great.