Distant Family
My children are growing up without any family around. Of course they have their mommy and daddy, but as far as any extended family whatsoever there is nobody. My husband’s family lives about eight hours away and my family is scattered throughout the West Coast. We’re in the Midwest.
Sometimes it pains me that they don’t have a grandpa or grandma to turn to and they don’t get to play with their cousins unless we first spend several hours on a plane. As our vacation nears I’m excited to have everyone together again, but it’s torture to leave.
My daughter speaks constantly of her cousin Ava who is a couple months younger than her. They talk on the phone once in a while (as much as four year olds will, anyhow) and they send artwork pack and forth through the mail occasionally, but as far as having a really solid relationship it’s pretty impossible.
This isn’t how I imagined my kids growing up. I always pictured my kids frolicking with family on a regular basis. Instead we’re lucky if we get to see the family once a year. There has to be a great advantage for kids who have a loving extended family available. I sometimes wonder what my kids are missing out on by not living near their family…let alone all the free babysitting I could get if family was around. I do have a hard time feeling bad for people who complain that their families are so annoying and all that jazz because honestly, sometimes I would give just about anything to have my family around to annoy me.
I’ve tried to create an extended family for my kids through social groups and our church, and luckily we have a lot of very caring people in our lives. I just dream of a day when my family will be a short car drive away instead of halfway across the country.
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Yvette says...
I grew up in a similar situation. And now as an adult I can honestly say I truly do appreciate family more. The mere fact that I didn’t have them around all the time, made me never take them for granted. However, there were moments when I did see them and I felt like I had missed out on so much family events. I use to wish I was apart of the inner circle (sort of speak) but then I realized we all can’t have the dream life, with the perfect family gatherings. So don’t be so hard on yourself. The fact that you even try to feel that void for your children speaks wonders about your character.