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“I knew you’d gone a little crazy when you started complaining that ‘only’ 35 people are coming,” my friend said.

“Down from a guest list of 80, that’s a lot of cancellations!”

“And there’s your first problem.” He accentuated every syllable for effect. “You invited 80 people. To a first birthday party.”

Yes, I know my daughter, who turns one October 12, won’t remember any of it. Yes, I know it’s mostly for the parents. Yes, I know it’s probably a tremendous waste of money. But my daughter only turns one once, and I wanted to throw her (myself?) a party.

It didn’t start out of control. I had very practical reasons for having it in a local steakhouse rather than our backyard or basement. We were in contract on a new home and had no idea where we’d be living at the time. Our old apartment couldn’t accommodate more than 10 people comfortably, and we had more guests than that if we just invited immediate family.

Faced with a room that holds up to 120, and a reasonable price per plate, I went a little crazy with the guest list.

Then I became fixated on a theme. It had to be something she likes, of course. Cool but not trendy. We’re not trendy type people. So no Dora or Disney Princesses.

Lilo & Stitch! Recent enough to be recognizable but old enough to be offbeat. We needed a custom-designed cake with Lilo & Stitch cake toppers. And I’d play DVDs in the background on my laptop during the party. I bought myself a dress that could pass for a Hawaiian print – big flowers all over. Adorable picture frame favors in the shape of surfboards, flip-flops and Hawaiian shirts. And balloons!

I didn’t go this crazy before my wedding.

The worst part of it all is I always made fun of kids’ birthday parties taken to an extreme. What’s the point of clowns, characters and face painting if the kid won’t remember it? Then you realize it really is for the parents and the photo ops, and it doesn’t seem so bad. After all, we’re grown-ups and if we choose to have a big party to celebrate our child’s birth, it’s our choice. I’m saying we, but honestly, the whole big party was my idea and my responsibility. My husband would have been happy with a cake.

I take a deep breath and reflect on what all this really means. We survived the first year of parenthood… and so did our soon-to-be-toddler. We are a happy little family of three.

Unbidden, Stitch’s crazy little alien voice pops into my mind with a line from the movie: “Ohana means family.” That’s what this party is really about.

I’ll throw a few Winnie-the-Pooh balloons into the mix and Ashley will be just as happy. We’ll be surrounded by friends, family and chocolate cake. What could be better?

Time to ‘fess up. Did anyone else go a little crazy in preparation for their baby’s first birthday? Did that tradition continue or did it taper off? Do you celebrate with a big bash every year or just milestones?

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Posted by Dawn Allcot on Thursday, October 15th, 2009 at 2:05 pm and is filed under Fun Stuff.
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Tags: birthday party, first birthday
Posted in: Fun Stuff