Would You Feed Your Baby Another Woman’s Breastmilk?
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It was the most gorgeous day yesterday, one of those early fall days where everyone wants to be outside in the sunshine as much as possible because winter is only a few weeks away. I took my son to the local playground, and ran into another mom I know, her sister, and their children.
One of the moms had to run to the car, leaving her baby with her sister. The baby started to wail that his mom was leaving, and the first mom jokingly suggested she nursed him to calm him down until his mom got back.
You know when you are joking, but there’s actually a little truth in what you say?
Nursing another woman’s child is unthinkable for many of us. And there’s even legislation against it: In the state of Oklahoma it’s actually illegal to nurse another woman’s baby without a special state issued license.
But before infant formula existed, it was common for a woman to nurse a baby that wasn’t her own. It’s an everyday event in countries where formula is unavailable or too expensive for most families. What else could you do for babies who’s moms died in childbirth, or where their mother was sick, couldn’t or just didn’t want to look after the baby? The easiest solution is to find another nursing mom.
Often upper-class women hired women to look after their babies, including nursing them, as they considered breastfeeding beneath them, or because of social pressure on them to not breastfeed.
But today, in the western world, where infant formula is safe and widely available, nursing another baby has become unthinkable. Health reasons are a large part of this, as we know that diseases like AIDS and Hepatitis can be transmitted through breast milk. And there’s the modern trend of thinking of body functions are private, so therefore breastfeeding should be discrete and between a mom and her baby.
But formula is not perfect, and very early premature babies often can’t digest even the most sophisticated formula. In a situation with a premature baby, and a mom who can’t breastfeed - common in early preemies, born before the mother has started to produce milk - donated breast milk is used to feed the baby. Several hospitals operate breast milk banks for lactating moms to pump and donate breast milk. The milk is screened for pathogens, pasteurized, and used to feed premature babies. It’s saved many premature babies lives.
There have been situations where a breastfeeding mom has been in an accident, in a coma, or needing medication that stopped her breastfeeding, and her baby was fed by other nursing moms until she recovered.
And in the spirit of upper-class ladies who considered it beneath them to nurse their own babies, Hollywood moms can hire wet nurses to feed their babies. Celebrity staffing agencies offer lactating nannies to nurse celebrity babies. Perhaps because silicone-enhanced breasts often can’t produce milk, or breastfeeding is so time consuming if you have to jet-set around the world, make movies and party?
But what about when a breastfeeding mom feeds another mom’s baby in a non-lifesaving situation? Is that unacceptable, or are we all just too squeemish about breastfeeding in 2008?
Dawn says...
Very good question. The only reason I wouldn’t do it/want it done is the risk of disease… and really, *you don’t know*. (Insert relevant analogy here. LOL)
I think donating milk is a wonderful thing, although I don’t know if I would ever do it, (I’m just not THAT altruistic), and if women want to pay for a wet nurse, they that’s their prerogative. (And ditto for the women who make a living that way.)
But “casual” breastmilk swapping? LOL Too dangerous.
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Sandi says...
I would let another woman breastfeed my child if I knew her and was aware of her lifestyle. It has to be safer than formula from China!!
Susan says...
I would let someone else breastfeed my baby.
Dawn says...
Sandi,
Good and funny but sad point, all at the same time!
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Moe says...
a friend who is stopping breastfeeding is offering us 3 months worth of frozen breast milk. when my adopted daughter gets here in 1-2 months, she’ll have been on formula her whole life (8-10 months at that point). Should I accept this gift and supplement the baby’s diet with it or is it risky since this isn’t her mom? The giver is a very healthy person and doesn’t drink, smoke, etc. and I trust her very much, and I know her diet is healthy and she’s not on any medications etc.
what do you think?
my email is hundertwasser -at- yahoo dot com.
Tamie says...
I would if I needed surgery or something. I found this article because I was doing a search to find out how I’d advertise such a service. I’m on mat leave and have decided not to go back to work. I’m breastfeeding my son, who’s 10 months old now, and have plenty of milk. I don’t drink (ever) or smoke and don’t take any kind of medication. I’m in good health, except for being overweight, which I don’t think would affect this. I have no idea how I’d go about finding someone who needed/wanted someone to breastfeed their baby. Of course, I’d be perfectly willing to have any blood tests to assure parents that I don’t have AIDS or take drugs, or whatever. Any ideas?