Aww, What a Pretty Little Girl!
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Thank you. Moms just love to get compliments about their children, don’t they?
Except that he’s a boy.
My son, almost two, is usually to be found wearing a dark blue shirt with a firetruck on the front, grey (or similar color) sweatpants, dark blue boots, and will be clutching one or more of the following: plastic snake, plastic beetle, real beetle, plastic alien, plastic pirate, stick, pebble, truck of some kind.
But he has long blond curly hair, and long blond curly hair seems to surpass all the other “boy” things about him. It’s not even that long, just below his collar. It’s never been cut, so it’s the hair he was born with. I can’t bear to cut it.
What’s wrong with long hair on boys? Plenty of adult male people have long hair, and no-one thinks they are girls, do they?
I’m not the only one, although I seem to be in a minority, especially in the Midwest. Perhaps I should move to Hollywood?
Cindy Crawford, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Julia Roberts’ sons have, or have had, long hair at one time.
Kate Hudson is quite well known for her 4-year-old son Ryder’s long hair, although she cites “religious reasons” for not cutting it.
I’m just too much of a wimp and I’ll cry if I have to chop off his baby hair.
The current plan is to get it cut if it looks like it will get caught on things, or when he asks for a haircut.
So what are your feelings on long hair for boys? Awful, or cool, or just don’t care?
Tags: baby hair. celebrities, Hair, long hair, mullets
Science-mom says...
I don`t mind long hair on my boys. In fact, I find them cute. But their Dad does. He says they look so wild. He cuts their happy every 3 to 4 months. Then they`d look so much like real big boys that I feel like I`ve lost my babies overnight.
Dawn Allcot says...
I think long, golden curls probably look gorgeous on a boy!!
Remember, though, men with long hair sometimes get mistaken for women (especially from behind) as well… it’s something they live with for their choice. (But it’s more embarrassing for other people when they realize their mistake… probably a source of amusement to the men!)
I’m not in your town, so I can’t say for certain, but I bet it’s not people being unaccepting of your choice–they are just unobservant.
I would say something exactly like you posted in the blog, “Actually, he’s a boy. But thank you. I think so, too!” Don’t even justify w/ an explanation… (Although if I was in a bad mood, I’d probably add something like: “Note the firetruck and plastic snake?”
Which would probably result in a debate with a total stranger about gender roles and stereotypes–girls can like firetrucks and play with snakes, too.
Yeah, your best bet is simply a “Thank you. He’s a boy.”
Dawn
Ashley says...
My 8 month old has extremely long eyelashes and big blue eyes. Ever since he was born he has been mistaken for a girl. I totally know where you are coming from! I think Long hair is just fine as long as it’s in good taste!
justine says...
i have an almost-3-yr-old boy who people mistake for a girl all the time!! hes got hair about to the base of his neck and bangs too…its not like i dress him all girly or anything… “oh what a pretty little girl!” “oh, he’s a boy…hes just got girly hair” …but his hair is like sooooooo cute…its like red and blond and brown all highlights and stuff…people even ask if i color his hair… i came on the internet this time to look for a way to cut his hair so people wouldnt think he was a girl anymore…but now i think i’m just gonna keep it how it is
Samantha says...
I don’t mind long hair on little boys at all. In fact, most of the time I think it’s cute. But I work in a children’s store and we have a mom who brings in child who is about 4 1/2, I think. He has very long, beautiful blonde hair nearly to midback. I always thought he was a girl until one of the other women said something and she just smiled and corrected her.
But one time he’ll have his hair just down straight, next time its in curls, and a couple of times, its been in pigtails - complete with bows.
I kinda think maybe he was SUPPOSED to be a girl!
Jackie says...
You know, I’m beginning to believe things like Samantha was relating are happening with a much greater frequency than it used to. I know exactly what she’s talking about with a boy in pigtails with bows on the ends. We’ve got a mother who brings her two sons probably about 3 and 5 in like that all the time. They are absolutely indistinguishable in appearance from little girls although I will admit they act more like boys. Is anyone else seeing this sort of thing?
Jennifer says...
Hey all. This conversation looks a little old and I just stumbled onto it, but I do have a bit to add.
Jackie, when you say that little boys with “girl’s” hairstyles are happening at a much greater frequency, you’re certainly right. I’m a cosmetologist (and mom!!) and work at a salon that does a lot of children’s hair. You wouldn’t believe how common it is for little boys to come in with ‘girl’ hair. Probably the most common are high ponytails or pigtails (and yes, frequently with ribbons or bows). Barrettes and clips are also common. I also see lots of French braids or braided pigtails, and boys with very long hair that is obviously intentionally long (i.e., not the result of neglectful hair-care). I would say that I probably see at least 2 of these types of things per week on average. And, of course, those are just the ones that I know are boys! There was one child of about 4 or 5 who came in with her mother on a regular basis that had very long hair (mid-back) with blunt-cut bangs down to the eyebrows. Her hair was freuqently in bouncy curls–obviously the result of a curling iron–when she came in with her mom. I had seen her probably 4 or 5 times before I ended up giving her a trim and found out that ’she’ was named Allen. By that point, I’d seen a few things and wasn’t too shocked, but still…..
I’ve only been working there a little over a year, and it’s been eye-opening. Some parents (because it’s not just moms) are probably thinking “what the heck, barrettes are easy”. But there are others who are obviously more systematic. And hairstyles aren’t the only thing either. I’ve seen a few other things that are probably more shocking.
Samantah says...
I’ll probably be sorry but I’ve got to ask, Jennifer, what were the more shocking things? Inquiring minds want to know
Jennifer says...
Samantha,
Well, I probably sounded a little more dramatic than I really intended when I said “shocking”, but there have been some eye-opening moments for me since going to work at this particular salon.
Besides the hair-related things I described before, I see a lot of little boys wearing nail polish. I admit that I can’t really throw stones here b/c my 2 1/2-year old son has worn his share on his fingers and toes, much to my husband’s chagin
There are also boys that come in wearing clothes that are certainly more geared towards girls. Most of the time it’s just a top in a “girlish” color with a little bow or lace, or a t-shirt with some graphic like Dora the Explorer or a Disney Princess. For the most part, they are probably hand-me-downs that are simply too good to waste. But there have been 2 or 3 boys that I have seen come in wearing dresses. But there’s only 1 boy I’ve seen in a dress repeatedly. He’s probably 3 or 4 and comes in often with his mother. About half the time he looks like a little boy (though with long hair), but at least 3 times he’s come in wearing a dress. And not just wearing it–he looks really pretty!! The dresses fit him well (probably bought for him rather than hand-me-downs), his hair is always super-cute, his nails are polished, and I think that at least the last time he was wearing a touch of makeup. Anyway, he doesn’t seem bothered by it at all and he actually seems to enjoy the attnetion he gets because the other women at the salon and I fuss over him quite a bit because he is so pretty. I think most of us that work there think that it’s a little weird, but we don’t want to make the boy uncomfortable, and his mother is a steady client who seems normal enough in most repsects.
Probably the thing I’ve seen that would most border on “shocking” was back around Christmas, one of our regulars brought in her 3-year old son to have him “done” for a pageant, and he wasn’t entering it dressed as a boy. He’d always had long hair (below his shoulders) but we were all surprised because he’d never looked girlish when he’d come in before. But apparently his mother and grandmother had decided that he was pretty enough to compete and, to be honest, they were right. We didn’t get to see him in his dress, but he looked extremely pretty when he left the salon. We found out later that he didn’t win though
As I said, I’ve only been at the salon for a little over a year, but that indicent made me wonder about those sorts of things. I asked our owner who has been there for years about it. She said that she’d seen that sort of thing before, but not too frequently. She said that most of the time that she had made over boys had been for costumes or drama and that sort of occassion, but she also mentioned other incidents as well.
One really interesting thing is that I didn’t see this sort of thing nearly so often when I worked in a bigger city. But I moved recently and my current salon is in a suburban area and it happens a lot more here. I guess I would have expected the opposite pattern for some reason.
stephanie says...
I’m a hairdresser and have also seen several boys come in to our salon with curls and barrettes in their hair.They are about 5 to 8 all have long hair. We polish all little girls nails for free while their mothers get their hair done this includes the boys I’m talking about at the reqest of their mothers. One mother wanted us to perm her 9 yr old sons long hair. i have done a roller set on a boy for a wedding and actually pinned his sides back off his face. Ihave curled highschol boys hair for school dances and proms. Most off the small boys look very much like girls, even 2 of them have their ears pierced.
Jennifer says...
Stephanie,
It doesn’t surprise me that you’ve seen similar things as I have, but you’re the first stylist from a salon besides my own that I’ve heard mention this. I have to admit that this trend fascinates me and I’d like to hear more about your experiences. However, I don’t want to clog up this blog on a topic that is obviously not the real purpose. If you don’t mind sharing your experience, you could email me at very.jenny@yahoo.com No big deal if you’d rather not.
Karen says...
Hi,
I just found this thread and wanted to let you know that I am also a hairdresser for going on 10 years and have done a number of boys that were brought in by their mothers for hairstyling services. I have probably worked on at least 18 boys in my time. Most have seemed quite happy to be getting their hair done and if they seem apprehensive in the least I will refuse. I have only refused on 2 occasions. There was one boy in particular that I remember, he was about 9 years old and had long brown hair to his waist and his mom asked to have it trimmed to mid back and wanted him to get a spiral perm like one of his girl friends at school. I thought that was a little bit much and asked the boy if he wanted his hair done like that. He said he did so I cut and permed his hair and when it was done both he and his mother were very happy with the results. Since that time he has come back numerous times and is now 16 and though he wears his hair in a most decidedly feminine way, I think he enjoys being a femme boy rather than a girl. Sorry if this goes on for long but I just wanted to add my two cents to this discussion.
Judi says...
Hi,
My hairdresser has thre different little boys who accompany their mother to the salon quite frequently. The boys are all similar in that they are markedly feminine and have mothers that are not at all bashful about showing them off. They are very proud of their girlish boys although only one of them brings her five-year-old in a dress. (I know them personally) The other two boys are usually wearing girlish clothes but the mothers have stopped short of putting them in a complete girl’s outfit. I think all the boys look cute and I am pleased that our stylists are non judgmental, quite willing to give the boys a girl’s hair style. The children are obviously loved by their mothers and that is what is important. If you’d like to know more about my friendship with one of the moms, drop me a note at judi.emmerich@yahoo.com It is important to support moms who do not feel compelled to go along with the crowd.